If you’re enduring any form of legitimate hazing, then there’s nothing greater than the concept of a week of solitude. If you’re the #13 PCP, then you’ll want nothing more than to shut off your phone. If you’re the #10 Token Fat Pledge, you’ll want nothing more than to go home and have mommy and daddy tell you how good you look. No matter who you are as a pledge, the week of Spring Break brings joyous freedom away from whatever it is that you hate most about pledgeship. If you’re struggling to find something you hate, we can tell you Why It Sucks.

Yet, if you truly believe #33 Pledgeship Is A Party, don’t even think about letting a week of college go buy without blacking out. Only the most hardcore #49 Future Frat-Stars know how to take things to the limit. Grab your soon-to-be initiated pledge class and head to Panama City, Key West or Mexico. Enjoy a week of sitting your fat asses on the beach without a brother in sight. Be smart about it though, you don’t want to end up where the brotherhood decides to party that week.

Feel free to fuck with the brothers while you’re gone. Let their drunken calls go to voicemail, and text them the number of a taxi when they ask you who’s driving that night. You’d be shocked at how dependent they are on pledges, especially when they’re deprived for 7 days straight. When you return the next week, you better be prepared to express some badass fuck stories from Spring Break. Yet, don’t be caught with your hand down your pants describing your Spring Break of family dinners and early-bird movie nights.

More than anything, the #62 Cost of Pledgeship takes a toll on just about everyone. Your everyday billionaire doesn’t endeavor to pledge, so the rest of us get by with cheap beer and couch pennies. When it comes to Spring Break, you need a cheap deal that does the trick. If you’ve never tried a hostel, you’re fucking missing out. It’s glorified frat-life, without the hazing. Hostel-hop around cities for mere pennies on the dollar, and fuck each and every gypsy along the way. If you’re looking to impress the brotherhood, that’s where you start.

There aren’t too many true believers of the brotherhood, but HostelBookers.com knows us well. Take 5% off Spring Break accomodation by clicking HERE! In the words of the beholder: “HostelBookers is an online accommodation specialist with a fun and young identity. They offer students and backpackers cheap accommodation around the world and run grate competitions and giveaways regularly.” There’s nothing better than cheap rooms when you’re going to need every penny to blow on drugs and alcohol! Check ‘em out.

It’s not hazing. It’s brotherhood.

Let’s let the source explain:

A university fraternity has been suspended after allegedly giving a quiz to its members that asked: ‘If I could rape someone, who would it be?’ The University of Vermont is investigating the source of the survey, who saw it and how it was used by Burlington brotherhood Sigma Phi Epsilon.

The survey begins with basic questions about the student’s name, subject studied and their favourite memories. It then asks ‘Where in public would I want to have sex?’, ‘Who’s my favourite artist?’ and ‘If I could rape someone, who would it be?’

‘The fraternity has instructed the chapter to cease all operations, pending further investigation,’ a spokesman at the fraternity’s headquarters said. ‘Any behaviour that demeans women is not tolerated by the fraternity,’ the national Sigma Phi Epsilon spokesman – in Richmond, Virginia – added.

Almost 20 years ago the same fraternity (house pictured) was criticised over sexual questions, after it asked students what they would do with a stripper. Campus police are now trying to establish if criminal charges could be pressed over the incident, reported the Burlington Free Press.

SOURCE

Just another perfect example of #16 The Importance of Secrecy. By no means are we condoning rape, or such a question. Yet, it’s obvious that such a brotherhood tradition was best kept internal. The real question is whether or not the survery would have ruffled so many feathers if it asked every question other than the rape one. Either way, it is what it is. #33 Pledgeship Is A Party, but not to the extent of illegal demonization of women. We all know that sorority girls will be the drunkest partiers of all, but if you’re a true frat-star, you’ll find a way to poud-town without force. That’s common sense 101.

Lesson learned? We’ll see how it all turns out. Next time, don’t ask the rape question. On another note, what would you do with a stripper? I can ask that question, right?

It’s not hazing. It’s brotherhood.

It’s sometimes best to let the media speak, even if their inspirational #29 anti-hazing douchebag commentary makes you sick. We can’t always be supportive of the brotherhood, now can we? Either way, take a quick read over a local newspaper’s definition of “6 Common Myths”. Cheers to high school hazing, let’s teach ‘em young!

At Bethesda-Chevy Chase High School, hazing during homecoming week is quite the tradition. Older students pelt freshmen with paint and, sometimes, assault them.

It’s not hazing. It’s brotherhood. 

]]> http://pledgingsucks.com/myths/feed 1 http://pledgingsucks.com/portfolio?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=portfolio http://pledgingsucks.com/portfolio#comments Sun, 01 Jan 2012 16:13:02 +0000 PledgeMaster http://pledgingsucks.com/?p=1961 Welcome. Around 2 years ago, a few fraternity brothers (a few drinks in) came up with the nit-witted idea to start a website. Broke as always, the stellar bunch somehow rounded up enough money to make it happen. 80+ articles and 100+ thousand unique visitors later, it’s time to break down all that the Pledging Sucks brotherhood has to offer…

More than anything, we want and need your comments, thoughts and submissions. You can always Submit A Story, or shoot us an email @ PledgeMaster@PledgingSucks.com. We’re sick of being the ones always talking. Speak the fuck up, everyone will listen. We’ve written articles on request, and are happy to do-so. Talk to us, we’re fucking lonely.

Do us a favor and Like Us on Facebook, or follow us on Twitter. It’s a legitimacy thing…

Pledgeship 101

We tried to cover the basics. Everything you need to know about pledging. All joking aside, we’re attempting to be educational. Take it or leave, there’s some valuable tips strewn throughout:

#2: Rush

#4: The Asshole of the Brotherhood

#13: Pledge Class President (PCP)

#16: The Importance of Secrecy

#18: GDI: God Damn Independents

#26: Brother Hazing

#29: Anti-Hazing Douchebags

#33: Pledgeship Is A Party

#36: Taking Advantage of Pledges

#37: New Year, New Semester, New Pledge Class

#38: FAQ: Fraternity Edition

#39: Anticipation of Pledgeship

#41: Why We Haze

#46: Awkward Transition

#49: The Future Frat-Star

#53: Pledge Attire

#54: Big Brothers

#55: Underground Fraternities

#57: Pledge Master

#59: Fraternity Stereotypes

#62: Cost of Pledgeship

#69: Signature Books

#71: Alcoholic Pledgeship

Featured

#00: Pledgeship

#00: Why It Sucks

#23: Top 10 Worst Hazing Scandals & Stories

#45: 14 Most Brutal Hazing Rituals

#65: Frat Castles

#20: GDI: God Damn Independents

#30: Fratty Vocabulary

#13: Pledge Class President (PCP)

#60: What The Letters Really Mean

Types of Pledges

#9: The Overachieving Pledge

#10: The Token Fat Pledge

#14: The Pledge Who Does Nothing

#21: The Ideal Pledge

#25: The Drunk Pledge

Advice

#31: How Old Is Too Old to Pledge?

#40: When Should I Pledge?

#51: When Does Hazing Go Too Far?

#64: Which Fraternity Is Right For Me?

Random

#1: Animal House

#3: Fear of the Unknown

#5: You Know You’re a Pledge When…

#6: Even The Great Tim Tebow Gets Hazed

#12: I Love College

#15: Brotherhood-Haters: Fuck the Police

#17: Celebrities Who Need To Get Hazed

#22: Frat Life Reality TV

#28: Urban Dictionary: Frat Edition

#30: Fratty Vocabulary

#34: Frat Hazing Video Parody

#44: Hazing Visualized

#52: Charlie Sheen: Celebrity Frat-Star

#56: Sports Hazing: New York Yankees

#59: Fraternity Stereotypes

#60: What The Letters Really Mean

#61: Brotherhood Communication: The List-Serve

#65: Frat Castles

#67: Summer Session

#68: Legitimacy Factor: Long Dick of the Law

#70: Game Day Pledgeship

#72: Hazing Video

#74: You Signed Up For This

Submitted Stories

#7: Rob’s Story: Line-Ups

#11: John’s Story: Candle-Light Hell Week

#19: Margarita Mondays

#35: GDI’s Story: Volunteer Pledge

#42: Anonymous: Bullet-Pointed Pledgeship

#48: Pledge-In-Progress

#66: Puke Laden Slip-n-Slide 

In The News

#43: Sports Program Canceled Due to Hazing Incident

#47: Sorority Hazing Scandal

#50: TKE Initiation Hazing Allegations

#58: SAE Kicked Off Campus

#63: Yale DKE Chanting

#73: SAE $12K Alumni Rampage

#75: Marching Band Hazing Death

Quote of the Day

#1, #2, #3, #4, #5, #6, #7, #8, #9, #10, #11, #12, #13, #14, #15, #16, #17, #18, #19, #20, #21, #22, #23, #24, #25, #26

It’s not hazing. It’s brotherhood.

HEADLINES: Student Collapses And Dies After University Marching Band ‘Hazing’

   A student collapsed and died after taking part in an extreme initiation rite with a famous university marching band. Robert Champion, 26, was found unresponsive on a bus outside an Orlando Hotel in Florida, where the band were staying after a football match this weekend. He vomited and complained of not being able to breathe before he passed out. The Marching 100 band at Florida A&M University, Tallahasee, has been shut down while an investigation into the drum player’s death takes place. The band has a long history of ‘hazing’ – a practice mainly found in the U.S., in which students are forced to take part in violent or distressing initiation rites in order to join elite clubs or groups. University staff admitted that 30 students were kicked out of the band this semester because of hazing and that there are three active investigations. University president James Ammons said he had suspended the performances and activities of all FAMU’s music groups out of respect for Mr Champion’s family, who live in Atlanta.

   Orange County Sheriff Jerry Demings said a preliminary autopsy was inconclusive and that more tests would be needed to know what caused Mr Champion’s death. But he said investigators had visited the university and concluded that ‘hazing was involved in the events that occurred prior to the 911 call for assistance.’ In Florida, any death that occurs in connection with hazing is a third-degree felony. ’In the next few days or weeks, it will become clearer as to whether any criminal charges will be forthcoming,’ added the sheriff in a statement.

   Mr Champion’s death followed Marching 100′s performance at a football game in which FAMU lost to annual rival Bethune-Cookman. The band has an impressive history, having played at several Super Bowls and represented the U.S. in Paris at the 200th anniversary of the French Revolution. But it has also faced continued controversy related to hazing for more than 20 years. In 1989, eight band members were charged with battery after they allegedly held a student against his will and beat his head with their elbows. Prosecutors dropped the charges after FAMU disciplined the suspects. In 1998, a band member was hit more than 300 times with paddles as part of an initiation into the clarinet section. Tallahassee police dropped their investigation because the band member’s participation in the event was voluntary.

   In 2004, trumpet player Marcus Parker was awarded a $1.8million civil judgment after being beaten so hard with a paddle board he suffered kidney failure.Band members this week told the Tallahassee Democrat they would be dismissed from the Marching 100 if they spoke to the media about Mr Champion’s death. The student’s father, also called Robert, said his son had always wanted to be in the band. ’He did what he wanted to do and he reached the plateau that he wanted to be.’

Source

Rough outcome, but it is what it is. It’s sad, but it seems as though his father understood the position his son was in. In other words, he knew his son was being hazed, and he knew it was a right of passage that his son accepted. Unfortunate story, and our prayers are with the family of the lost.

It’s not hazing. It’s brotherhood.

Celebrities all around the country can learn a thing or two from the Brotherhood. Hell, if only Tiger Woods would have taught his multitude of sluts about the #16 Importance of Secrecy, maybe he’d still have his smokin’ hot wife and a decent golf game. On another note, society continues to breath down the neck of the brotherhood regarding hazing. Well, maybe they should spend more time monitoring the boys locker rooms at Penn State. Too soon?

Pledging Sucks on Facebook. Like Us, JoePa would’ve wanted you to do so:

It’s not hazing. It’s brotherhood.

While the Brotherhood recommends you find solance in your pledge brothers, you want nothing of it. As the #4 Asshole of the Brotherhood practically kicks you in the nuts, you regret ever considering a life of boat shoes, khakis and polos. Yes, in all honesty, there are times when the life of a #18 GDI can seem pretty damn glamorous. Now is that time. Yet, when it’s all said and done, you only have yourself to blame. Remember, you signed up for this.

Society continues to take shots at Greek life. While we’re definitely not the most positive attribute to society, we’re not even close to the worst. Either way, society continues to have sympathy for pledges all around the country. Society cries, fights and protests for the so-called victims. Random people everywhere are shunning the age-old art of hazing, portraying young freshmen as victims of hatred. The Brotherhood’s response? It’s simple: You signed up for this.

Life has, and always will be, a mere compilation of small decisions made every second of the day. In the end, it is you, and only you, who decides what happens next. When it comes to #2 Rush, you’re the one making the choice to better your college career. You’re the one who walks in the door and meets the Brotherhood. You’re the one who shakes the President’s hand in acceptance of your bid. You’re the one who ties the shoelaces on your boat shoes to sport the ultimate #53 Pledge Attire. You’re the one who recites the Greek alphabet in unison while being pelted by food. You’re the one who embraces your pledge brothers in times of physical and mental turbulence. In the end, you’re the one who has the power to walk out that door if you can’t take it anymore.

Make sense? Let’s draw a comparison. If you join the ROTC, Navy Seals, Army, or whatever, does society come to your side because your drill sargearnt almost drowns you? Absolutely not. It’s training for the real world, if not for warfare. I find it ironic that all military training goes unnoticed to the public. Yet, their hazing goes far beyond that of the Brotherhood. Let’s remember that not all hazing goes down the lines of #23 The Top 10 Worst Hazing Scandals & Stories. Those are the very select few, literally one-in-a-million. In the grand scheme of things, there are very few differences between military training and brotherhood hazing. In the end, #41 Why We Haze is all the same. While one is for the military, another is for the Brotherhood. Either way, you’ve signed up for both. There is no contract, and there are no shackles keeping you from leaving. For whatever reason, if you can’t handle it anymore, the door is always open.

It makes me literally sick to read the daily reports of hazing incidents all around the country. Pledges everywhere are calling it quits. Yet, instead of merely walking out the door with dignity, they run home to mommy and daddy with more than enough stories to cripple the Brotherhood. In this day in age, if you don’t know what you’re getting into, you’re the only one at fault. It doesn’t get more clear than this: You signed up for this, so deal with it.

More than anything, the Brotherhood respects your decision to part ways. If a life of fraternal order is not right for you, then so be it. As a brother, we’ll never support a pledge’s continued presence if his heart is not in the right place. If both sides would be better off parting ways, then so be it. Yet, the difference is made post-pledgeship. What will you become when you walk out that door: bitter? rogue? vengeful? If you’re dying to know, the honorable thing to do has and always will remain the same. The #16 Importance of Secrecy stands strong, whether intitiated into the Brotherhood or not. Keep quiet, and hold your head high. You signed up for this. Don’t make the Brotherhood pay for your mistake.

It’s not hazing. It’s brotherhood.

Below is an email sent out to the alumni listserv this week. It is important to keep in mind, for a fuller mental picture, that SAE was shut down for nearly a decade, so the offending alumni are at least in their mid-thirties:

 

Concerned Alumni,

 

We appreciate your concern at the state of the house and thank you for coming by this weekend. We agree that the house is currently in the worst state that we have ever seen it and sympathize to a large degree with your concern about a lack of respect for the property. However, we think it is only fair, in the spirit of full disclosure, to let you know a bit more about how the house came to look, and smell, the way that it does.

 

Our officers and other concerned brothers spent a great deal of time and effort in the two weeks leading up to Homecoming to make sure that the house was presentable and that our alumni would be proud to come back. We had brothers painting, cleaning, repairing dry wall, vacuuming, etc. in order to make sure the house was in good order. We had brothers go to great lengths to get food together for the cooking that they preformed on Saturday – a new addition to homecoming that we hope you all enjoyed. We planned and paid for a cash bar that had been approved through appropriate channels, but the school later reneged and it had to be shut down. All this to say that for a 101 year old house, 2500 Kensington Place was looking as good as I’ve seen it in my time here. Then our alumni came.

 

To keep this short we will make a list of a few of the damages done by our alumni over the weekend:

 

2 4′ X 12′ sections of dry wall completely destroyed
17 broken windows
2 broken ceiling fans (all blades removed and glass shattered)
Every toilet in the house clogged with various objects including beer cans, toilet paper, etc.
Paint splattered all over the bar room
A slur painted on the basketball goal, which was also broken
Broken porch lights
5 broken door frames and locks
3 broken exit signs
2 discharged fire extinguishers (sprayed into the rooms of officers and onto the cars of active brothers with more slurs and graphic pictures drawn into the chemicals)

 

Officers rooms:

 

Treasurer’s room:
All furniture broken with over $2000 worth of damage and his ottoman thrown through his window onto the adjacent roof

 

President’s room:
Broken bed
Desk chair thrown through two different windows (incidentally both the chair and the shattered glass hit our president in the face as he was cleaning up beer cans in the front yard after the tailgate)

 

Rush chair’s room:
The entire contents of the rush chairs room were found thrown through a window and onto the roof of the chapter room
Also of note, on Saturday night an alumni had to be stopped from defecating in the rush chair’s refrigerator with a roomful of his contemporaries

 

House manager’s room:
Relatively little damage with the only issue being that every window was broken out

 

Social chair’s room:
It is currently impossible to walk into the social chair’s room without stepping on glass as 8 Champagne bottles and 7 handles of liquor were smashed on his floor
His bed was also vomited in and had a couch placed upside down in the vomit

 

Total (Minimum): $12,000
- Taken from the minimum cost for replacing or repairing all issues listed above.
- Costs include labor and materials provided by Vanderbilt Plant Operations

 

As this kind of destruction has become increasingly commonplace over the past few years, we anticipated some level of mayhem. What we got however was much worse than we expected. There is, without doubt, a very serious issue concerning the lack of respect for the property of SAE. The same can be said for the property of the brothers currently residing in the house. It is interesting to note that all of the destruction done this weekend, and in homecoming weekends past, has come from alumni and not the active brothers. There is a wealth of evidence to back up these claims and we take no issue if anyone would like to discuss the issue further.

 

The house means a lot to those of us who have enjoyed the opportunities that it affords us. For many, it has been an opportunity to meet lifelong friends and have the time of our lives; we would love to see it return to its former state. However, that process of transformation cannot happen solely through the hard work of current brothers. It will require a serious and concerted effort by both alumni and brothers to raise a good deal of funding in order carry out any kind of renovation plan. In so doing we will be able to create a place that commands respect and that will be much less inviting to the kinds of activities witnessed this weekend. We share your in your vision and in your frustration; there is little that would make us happier than to see the house returned to the majesty apparent in pictures we’ve seen from the 60′s. We welcome any suggestions on how we might make the house a better place and hope that we will be able to use this past weekend as a way to bring us together with the common goal of improving the house for future True Gentlemen. We sincerely appreciate all of the contributions that you have made, past and present, that have made the house what it is today. We along with the actives of TN-Nu sincerely hope that the actions of a few will not sour our relationship in the future.

 

Please feel free to reach out to either of us with any questions or concerns that you might have.

 

Yours in the bonds,

XXXXXX
EA
XXXXXX@vanderbilt.edu

 

&

 

XXXXXX
Alumni Relations Chair
XXXXXX@vanderbilt.edu

 

Credit: DeadSpin

When it comes down to it, once a brother, always a brother. Whether you’re 50 years old, or a newly initiated freshman, you’re all on the same playing field. So what if alumni entertain the need to shit on someone’s bed? It happens. What if that bitchy glass window is talking shit to you… so you throw a brick through it? The window definitely deserved it. Agreed? Yet, the #1 Animal House weekend described above goes a tad bit too far, to say the least. It’s one hell of a story though. The letter to the alumni speaks for itself. I only wish it was all caught on camera: #12 I Love College. Party on Garth, party on.

It’s not hazing. It’s brotherhood.

Whether it’s completely staged, or legitmately real, the hazing depicted in this video doesn’t venture far from the norm. The fact that a video camera is capturing it all makes the entire situation less beleivable, but hey, maybe they never got the memo on the #16 Importance of Secrecy. In my humble opinion, the situation was real. The brothers were mindfucking one of the pledges, who proceeded to take the bait and fall a little too hard in the end.

Thoughts? Sound off in the comments below: 

It’s not hazing. It’s brotherhood.

I don’t care how much of a #49 Future Frat-Star you were in high school, the amount of drinking you’ll endure within your four years of fraternal involvement will conquer all other feats. It’s a common joke that alumni return to the fraternity after a year of the real world, only to find out that they’ve become complete lightweights. Unfortunate, isn’t it? Either way, you’ll build up one hell of a tolerance during pledgeship, only to expand on it in the remainder of your college duration.

Whether you sipped on Papa’s cognac every weekend, or arrived in college a virgin in more than one way, your alcoholic experience of pledgeship will push you to the limit, no matter your experience. Puking is a must, and if you don’t, you aren’t doing it right. There are endless reasons as to #41 Why We Haze. Liquor hazing is no exception. Pledgeship teaches you how to hold your liquor, know your limit, and handle yourself at all times. If I were a father (which I am not), I’d make sure my kid gets hammered atleast once before he goes to college. God forbid the first time he blacks out is during pledgeship in a frat house. I think you can all assume the worst.

Social Drinking

Pledgeship really does foster social growth. You learn how to drink for the first time in your life. I’m not talking about sipping on a beer. I’m talking about knowing the rules of the game. As much as we love to piss off the lightweights by throwing names around, it is what it is. If it takes you two beers to get drunk, then so be it. In all honesty, you’ll save a fuck-ton of money in your life. Good for you, Mr. Lightweight. Pledgeship involves drinking on a weekly, if not daily basis. The #25 Drunk Pledge knows what I’m talking about. You learn how to pace yourself at a party, and just how drunk you need to get to gain liquid courage in talking to that slampiece you’ve had your eye on.  You need to learn how to handle yourself at a bar. Nothing will piss the Brotherhood off more than a pledge getting kicked out of a bar for being too drunk. Get a grip, and learn how to drink. You’ll value these lessons when you’re drinking with your boss one night in the future.

Bartending School

Pledgeship is a glorified version of bartending school. You’ll learn how to mix and mash every drink known on earth. Even more so, you’ll learn what the cheapest beers and liquors are, and how to make a cheap drink taste like an expensive one. You’ll learn to make shots weaker for girls, and stronger for guys. You won’t get the credit for making a good drink, but you’ll sure as hell get punished for making a shitty one. By the end of pledgeship, you’ll have a decent portfolio of bartending skills underneath your belt. Whether it’s at a tailgate, social or in your room, pledges will know how to fix something up quick at the whim of the Brotherhood.

Popping the Cherry

While the points above are all fine and dandy, alcoholic pledgeships can be taken to the extreme. You’ll learn how to take a pull for the first time, along with shot-gunning and funneling a beer. You’ll do numerous keg-stands, and learn what a Jersey Turnkpike is the hard way. If you have an issue with anything described so far, go fuck yourself. Pledgeship and the Brotherhood just isn’t for you. If you’re down to party, check out CollegeBarStore.com to fulfill your alcoholic fantasies.

Of course everyone is always going to read about the pledges that were liquor hazed to the worst extent (i.e. #23 Top 10 Worst Hazing Scandals). I won’t support killing a pledge with liquor, but can we at least see the positive lessons the brotherhood was trying to instill? Maybe not…

In the end, your alcoholic pledgeship builds up a tolerance that even the jolliest Germans can’t imagine. As a piece of advice, being drunk is always a great excuse for doing something wrong. If the Brotherhood is fired up enough, you’ll never be punished for sipping on something sweet at the oddest hours of the day. Feel out your pledging experience as it goes and gauge the positives and negatives of getting drunk. You just might come to find that a semester-long blackout might be a blessing in disguise.

As always, the Brotherhood has your back. If you’re a pledge in need of some savings, or a brother in need of the cheapest shit out there, SaveOnBrew has you covered: You’ve got the zip code… We’ve got the beer deals. SaveOnBrew.com– like Google, for beer deals!

It’s not hazing. It’s brotherhood.

Let’s make this clear, if you go to a college without a football program, then you’re most likely still living at home. Am I not right? A football program stands as the backbone of a true university. With a football program comes a handful of high-quality game days. Ironically, unless your brotherhood decides to hire a team of taxis, bartenders, musicians and door-holders, pledges will be in high demand. If you’ve yet to appreciate your pledging brethren, your first college game-day will turn the tide.

Let’s take a look at the numerous, yet essential purposes that a pledge will undertake during game day. To be clear, a quality game day encompasses a ton of sorostitutes, unlimited alcohol, quality entertainment, and a worry-free mind, to name a few.

Suppliers/Stockers

Alcohol doesn’t grow on trees. Don’t pull out a technicality on that one; you know what I mean. Someone has to drive to the store, pay for the liquid gold, drive it back and stock the bar. It’s just one of the many #62 Costs of Pledgeship. Alcohol is just the start as a true tailgate must encompass a variety of delicious goodness. If there’s a grill to be manned, your pledges will be the ones flipping the burgers and putting the ketchup on the dogs.

Pledge Drivers

Like I said before, unless your brotherhood pulls out a wild-card with a limo and a party-bus, there’s got to be someone who picks up the sorosituties. Pledge driving is one of the greatest aspects of pledgeship, and an integral part of game days. Someone needs to pick up the scantily-clad sorositutes, and it ain’t gunna be a brother, that’s for sure. Pledges bring the game to the brotherhood. The brotherhood then crushes the game. It’s cyclical, and awesome. On another note, there is a method to our madness of #41 Why We Haze. Pledge drivers equates to no DUI’s.

Risk Managers

While the #16 Importance of Secrecy stands supreme, risk follows the same pathway. Our #65 Frat Castles must remain elitist; not everyone can be let in. And with that in mind, not everyone should be let out. It’s the pledges’ duty to guard the doors and manage the risk. While I’d like to think a pledge would go to jail in place of a brother (devotion), pledges can’t do everything. But they can make sure the drunken masses aren’t being retarded, resulting in cops swarming the premises.

Bartenders

We need cold beer. The mountains must be blue, that’s for damn sure. Pledges not only stock the bar, but they man it as well. By the end of pledgeship, each and every pledge will have a solid amount of bartending skills under their belt. What if I don’t want to get out of my seat on the couch? Not to worry, pledges serve as waiters as well. Champagne, bitch. Make it snappy.

Entertainment

If your #2 Rush chair has done his homework, then there’s a handful of pledges who can play some tunes. In that case, pledges serve as your entertainment for the evening. Get a guitar and a set of drums, and let the cheapest band in town rock out for the night. And if it just so happens that your pledge class has no musical talent what-so-ever, atleast use them for another form of entertainment. What am I talking about? Shotgun contests, chicken fights, karaoke, etc. Make them look like idiots for your own comedic pleasure.

Cleaning Crew

If you’ve partied the right way, your frat castle will be trashed. Congratulations, that’s a good thing. When everyone heads to the game, let Santa’s little helpers make life a little cleaner. They know their place in life, and they’ll make sure that by the time you get back from the game, you’ll have a spiffy-looking house to trash once again.

Like I said, pledges make the world-go-round. Especially on game day.

It’s not hazing. It’s brotherhood.

After a semester of rituals, hazing, partying and what-not, any and all pledges develop a lifestyle unknown to most. By no means is this a bad thing. Your wardrobe becomes classy, and your frat-star mentality develops. In all forms and facets, pledging is a lifestyle. Live it, and learn to love it. Almost every brother reminisces on the best of times, and the worst of times, of pledgeship. Yet, only the greatest never stop pledging.

Like the Brotherhood on:   

… or follow the pledging lifestyle on   

It’s not hazing. It’s brotherhood.

The Signature Book is one of the most elemental aspects of pledgeship, and one of the most universal reasons why PLEDGING SUCKS. As always, each and every fraternity is different. Yet, in some way or another, the Signature Book shows its wiry little head on every campus. Some fraternities give their pledges a binder, portfolio or folder. In most cases, the signature book comes as a much-needed accessory to the “Bible” of each fraternity. Every fraternal chapter has a book of history, values, bullshit, morals and more bullshit. But hey, fraternities were, after all, founded upon things other than partying, right?

Anyways, the universal Signature Book serves a handful of purposes:

Learning the Brothers

These books are usually the compilation of every single brother’s signature in the fraternity. As most fraternities are relatively small, it’s not that big of a deal. Try getting 150 signatures… welcome to the big leagues. Either way, most pledges are required to garner the signature of each and every brother. In this respect, pledges get a quick and painful dose of names to learn. And you better fucking learn those names, that’s for sure.

Scavenger Hunt

Like I said, garnering these signatures isn’t easy. In most cases, the brothers will send their pledges searching for random objects, gifts, chores, etc. The purpose? Just to fuck with ‘em. A brother’s signature is valuable, especially when the pledges have a quota to reach. With that in mind, a pledge won’t hesitate to buy a brother a 6-pack for their oh-so-important signature. Who ever knew your handwriting would be so valuable one day?

Informative

Signatures aren’t the only component to the Signature Book. Depending on what fraternity you’re in, there’s a fuck-ton more information than you could ever wrap your mind around. These books can be filled with history, rituals, secrets, facts, etc. It’s a fraternities “little black book”, no pun intended. Without a doubt, the #16 Importance of Secrecy comes into play more than ever with these hand-held masterpieces. If you think all the information is necessary, you’re fucking retarded. Don’t be surprised if a brother makes a pledge write down and memorize the fact that Joe Shmoe fucked 27 girls last month. Funny? Yes. Necessary? Absolutely not.

Responsibility

Like anything during pledgeship, it’s all a test. Signature Books throw a ton of responsibility onto each and every pledge, from secrecy to memorization. While the #4 Asshole of the Brotherhood could rock his word with pages worth of facts, bullshit and scavenger hunts, most brothers take the high-road and merely use the book for it’s main purpose: to have each pledge learn the names and basic information of each and every brother. It’s all about responsibility. When it’s all said and done, these books stockpile quite the memories.

If you didn’t know already, now you know. For every freshman with a tucked in polo, boat shoes and khaki shorts, come the little black book, folder or portfolio tucked underneath his arm. If you’ve gotten to understand pledgeship so far, you can appreciate the tradition.

It’s not hazing. It’s brotherhood.

What exactly  am I talking about? I’m talking about #15 Brotherhood Haters: Fuck the Police. Yet, in a weird way, if your fraternity hasn’t somehow gotten involved with the law, you’re probably not partying, hazing or fucking hard enough. It’s like Lil Wayne going to jail. Yea, it sucks, but it makes him even more badass. Anyways, when it comes to fraternities, pledgeship throws a whole new ball of risk into the mix. The normal worries of “Minors in Possession” or “Driving under the Influence” become mere hiccups in the larger picture. If you haven’t read our In The News section, check it out. You’ll get a sour taste of what I’m talking about.

The #23 Top 10 Hazing Scandals and Stories paints the perfect picture. Pledgeship can go wrong, and no longer can mommy and daddy protect you. This is serious shit, and they’ll throw your ass in jail for it. So, #41 Why Do We Haze, if the risk is so great? We do it because it’s exactly what they don’t want us to do. 10 bucks says that the amount of alcohol consumption of 18-21 year olds would decrease if the legal drinking age were 18. And 10 bucks says less people would smoke marijuana in the long-run if it were legalized in America. Lastly, 10 bucks says hazing wouldn’t be so fucking bad if it wasn’t already taboo in society. It’s a matter of principle. Like anything in life, if something is illegal, there’s going to be a black market for it.

Anyways, the fact still remains. Hazing is “bad”, and the Long Dick of the Law stands ready and willing to fuck you if the opportunity arises. Now more than ever, secrecy is the most important factor of pledgeship. When the day does come when your fraternity stands before the chubby fellows with a badge, stand up straight and take it like a man. Each and every fraternity needs to brush arms with the law a time or two. It’s a legitimacy factor, and it reminds you just how badass your life of partying, hazing, fucking and so-on has and always will be.

It’s not hazing. It’s brotherhood.

No matter where you’re from, summer is hot-as-hell. That’s life, so get used to it. Just be happy you’re not the #10 Token Fat Pledge. He can fill up a glass of water with his sweat. Anyways, where you choose to live up the last few (free) summers of your life is up to you. Granted, there are always a few options on the table. If you’re coming from money, a summer abroad is always an option (and a damn good one at that). It’s hard to pass up a summer in Rome, London or Melbourne. But hey, we’re not all shitting out hundred-dollar-bills these days. Need money? Get a fucking job. Frattin’ ain’t cheap, that’s for sure. And of course, there’s the internship. Not all of us can intern for a sports team, beer company or daddy’s law firm over the summer, so grab your nuts and get a job at the Golden Arch if need-be. An hour of work equates to a valuable 6-pack of brew. Well worth it.

If you’re a true #49 Future Frat-Star, you know what the long days of the year mean: Summer Session. Your college has it, so take advantage of it. Summer session could quite possibly be the greatest feature of college altogether. It’s a continuation of Fall and Spring semester, minus the packed schedule of classes. The old saying of “lazy days of summer” takes on a whole new meaning. Your days will never feel longer, and you’ll never have more free-time in your life.

When it comes to summer session, fraternity-life is a little more low-key. Frats and sororities usually close up shop, but the brotherhood keeps in touch. If you’re a potential brother in your first year, summer session is the perfect time to get to know various fraternities before #2 Rush starts up in Fall. It gives you an extra opportunity to figure out the #59 Fraternity Stereotypes ahead of time.

Benefits of Summer Sesh:

- Minimal Coursework (2 classes max)

- Don’t have to live at home

- More free time than you’d ever imagine

- Continuation of Fall & Spring semester

- Party Every Day

If you’re not sold on the idea by now, there’s something seriously wrong with you. Just try it, give it a test-drive one summer and see how it goes. Feel free to shoot me an email when you’re sick of the non-stop parties and overwhelming free-time. It’s a tough life. And if you need a reason to do it, throw around the golden words of “getting ahead in school” or “expanding my knowledge” to your parents. They’ll bite: hook, line and sinker. Summer session: just one of the many reasons why #12 I Love College.

It’s not hazing. It’s brotherhood.

Check out the anonymous submission below:

“I can’t tell you the frat I am in. Buffalo pledging (off campus) is known as some of the hardest shit in the country. I’ll tell you one of the more enjoyable things I had to do. It was a sunday night and all the pledges (including me) were lined up in a basement. We were all blindfolded and had no clue what house we were in. They take the blindfolds off we see a slip n’ slide. We all know some slip n slide story but this one was insane.

Well, there you have it. Just one of the many reasons why we cherish the ritual of hazing so much. You have to picture a group of hammered bros sitting around their backyard with a slip-n-slide one summer afternoon. With the more drinks they pound down, the better their hazing creation becomes. Come Fall, their summer hazing idea becomes a reality. It’s amazing what dreams can come true with a few pledges to work with.

I’ve got to imagine that the actual event isn’t nearly as bad as wearing the same damn shirt every weekend for the rest of the semester. As always, hazing becomes an Olympic sport. The brotherhood inspires you to try new foods, loose weight and stay athletic all at the same time. 

Too much? Not at all. Welcome to the brotherhood. 

It’s not hazing. It’s brotherhood.

Word of the wise from a summer of bro-haters on Wall Street and in the Obama-sphere.

The Brotherhood will be back in action come fall.

Finish off your Coronas, and get ready for rush, pledges, game-days and so much more.

As always, shoot any stories, comments or questions to PledgeMaster@PledgingSucks.com.

Go Greek, or go the fuck home. Enjoy the rest of your summer bros.

It’s not hazing. It’s brotherhood.

We could talk all day long about the intangibles of fraternal brotherhood. Well, let’s be honest, there’s nothing greater than a badass fraternity house. It goes along with the #59 fraternity stereotype, and can even mold a fraternity when it comes to #60 what the letters really mean. The top houses on campus usually correlate to the best looking houses on campus. Don’t get me wrong, there are some serious shithole fraternity houses out there. But hey, who the fuck wants to talk/look at those?

The more badass your house, the better looking your sorostitutes will be. It’s a legitimacy factor. The better looking houses have an easier time recruiting #49 future frat stars during #2 rush. Certain fraternities are judged by their physical house, whether they maintain it or not, and how active it continues to be. Moral of the story? Sometimes it’s okay to judge a book by it’s cover.

Keep in mind these are all fraternity houses, not sorority houses. The extent to which college sorostitutes are spoiled goes beyond my words. It’s ridiculous. But hey, a bunch of college guys don’t want an expensive French-looking mansion. We want a frat castle: an indestructible fortress of greatness. It’s like having a man drive a million-dollar convertible. Yea, it might be nice. But we’d rather be driving a million-dollar truck. It’s a southern thing.

We’ve searched around for some of the more badass frat castles in the country. Check ‘em out:

Upload the houses that we missed in the comments below…

I know there are a ton of badass frat castles out there.

It’s not hazing. It’s brotherhood.

The comparison has often been made between the choice of wives and the choice of universities. When in high school, your college counselors ask you time and time again whether you’re 100% sure you’ve made the correct decision. While the Brotherhood completely agrees, we might have to take it a step further. So yea, let’s call your college your wife. In that case, your choice of fraternity is that of your mistress. Yet, let’s not go around fucking everything that walks; that ends up with divorce, child support and much worse. Your fraternity should fit you perfectly as you’re tied to it for life. Your brothers will hide your secrets and comfort your pains. While you might’ve already chosen your college (much like already choosing your wife), you have a second chance at happiness by choosing your fraternity (your mistress). Make sense? Apologies for the symbolism, it’s the easiest way of explaining things. It’s #30 fratty vocabulary at it’s best.

No matter what university you go to, as long as there’s Greek life, there’s going to be a few choices when it comes to fraternities. If you’re at a small college, your options are slim. Life sucks, that was your mistake for going there in the first place. If you’ve garnered the nut-sack to attend a prestigious public university (one of decent size), you might have between 10 and 20 fraternities to choose from. Call me crazy, but if I’m choosing the girl I’m going to cheat on my wife with, I better have some fucking options.

So let’s get right down to it. What elements can dictate your decision? Well, each rushee has his own perspective on things, but we’ll delve into the most basic components of choosing a fraternity:

Fraternity Stereotype

Like we discussed in our post on #59 fraternity stereotypes, each fraternity has it’s own look, way of life and reputation. It’s almost impossible to truly understand what the stereotype of each fraternity is within the first week of #2 rush, but you better find a way to understand the basics. Right off the bat you’ve got fraternities based on race, religion and ethnicity. Whether you’re black, white, Christian, Jewish or multicultural, there’s a fraternity for you. Grab your balls and ask around. Don’t be afraid to ask the obvious and establish what fraternity has what kinds of guys.

The stereotypes get even more detailed. Southern, Guido, athletic, social, nerdy frats are all out there. If you know what kind of person you are, or atleast what kind of person you want to be, find the right match. Understand that alcohol and drugs are prevalent no matter where you go. Make sure you know what you’re doing, and whether or not you’re prepared to get hammered every night, blow down a time or two, or jerk it in solitude. The choice is yours.

Friends and Family

One of the biggest determinates of choosing one fraternity over another involves a family member or close friend already being apart of one of the brotherhoods. Being a “legacy” involves having a family member in a fraternity. That family member could have graduated decades ago, but you’re still a legacy. In most cases, legacies are given automatic bids.

When it comes to having close friends in a fraternity, it’s hard to walk down a different path. The feeling of comfort is huge in college, and when you’ve got someone looking out for you, it’s hard to think outside the box. Just realize that the decision of your brother, father or close friend has nothing to do with your own well being. It’s your life, so make your own fucking decision.

Hazing

Right down the lines of fraternity stereotypes comes the notion of hazing. While it’s impossible to truly know just how much a fraternity hazes, it should be a crucial part of your decision. Again, don’t be afraid to ask around. It should be fairly obvious as to which fraternities haze and which ones don’t. #44 Hazing visualized will give you a small taste of what to expect. You need to understand just how difficult it is going to be to enter one fraternity or another. Don’t become starry eyed with the top social house if you’re a weak, math-club introvert. Hazing can make or break you. Be smart about it.

Price

Which fraternity is right for you? Well, it’s the one you can fucking afford. Let’s get this straight, fratting ain’t free. It isn’t cheap, and it’s going to cost you. Fraternities are pretty much up-front with you as to how much it’s going to cost you every year. Run the numbers and make an educated decision. You might have to involve your parents as well. Check out the #62 cost of pledgeship post to get a better idea.

Personality

You want to find the fraternity that matches you. Don’t try and be something you’re not. When talking with the brothers at rush, make an effort to gauge how much you’d like to spend the next four years with and around them. Keep in mind that the brothers of your fraternity can and will be life-long friends of yours. If you’re a drinker, then find your fellow alcoholics. If you’re a library-guy, then find the smartest fraternity. While thinking outside the box is almost always a positive, be careful when it comes to joining a fraternity.

The overwhelming key involves your ability to ask around. Find out #60 what the letters really mean. Don’t be afraid to ask the tougher questions to brothers of each fraternity and fellow students on campus. The more you ask, the more you’ll know. Your decision will only be as easy as you make it. Some guys join the first fraternity they enter, while others test the waters of each and every one. You’ll find that the older guys who ventured to a greater number of houses during rush are more satisfied with their decision than those who had made up their mind before rush even started.

Don’t be naive; take it slow. It’s a big decision, and one that you should make with pure confidence. Take into consideration each fraternity’s stereotype, the opinions of family and friends, the rumored amount of hazing during pledgeship, the cost of each fraternity and the personality similarities. The more work you put in now, the better off you’ll be four years down the line.

What went into your decision? Sound off in the comments below.

It’s not hazing. It’s brotherhood.

Yale is imposing a five-year punishment on its most notorious fraternity and asking the frat’s national organization to do the same.

Delta Kappa Epsilon brought the university bad publicity last fall, when a group of pledges stood in Yale’s freshman quad shouting “No means yes! Yes means anal!” and other sexually aggressive chants. The unwelcome attention multiplied in April, when the federal Department of Education announced it is investigating a complaint that Yale harbors a hostile sexual environment. Citing the DKE incident, among others, the complainants contend that Yale has “not a zero-tolerance policy, but a tolerance policy.”

Now, Yale College dean Mary Miller ’81 PhD announces, the college’s Executive Committee will ban the DKE chapter from conducting on-campus activities and using Yale e-mail or bulletin boards for five years. Since the chapter is not a registered student group, Yale can’t simply suspend it. But the ExComm has asked DKE’s national organization to do so.

In an e-mail to students and faculty, Miller writes that, after a “full hearing,” the Executive committee found:

“The DKE chapter, as an organization, one comprised of Yale students, had threatened and intimidated others, in violation of the Undergraduate Regulations of Yale College as they pertain to “harassment, coercion or intimidation” and “imperiling the integrity and values of the University community.” The Executive Committee further found several fraternity members had also, as individuals, violated the same regulations.”

She can’t reveal the names of those individuals or their punishments, Miller writes, because ExComm proceedings are confidential.

After the chanting incident last fall, DKE’s parent organization ordered the chapter to stop recruiting — but then lifted the ban within weeks, apparently without telling Miller.

The national organization’s executive director, Doug Lanpher, tells the Associated Press he was surprised and disappointed at Miller’s announcement, “because he thought the negotiations were confidential.” (Miller’s e-mail doesn’t mention negotiations, just ExComm actions.) The AP article continues:

“He said the fraternity had dealt with the matter internally by placing the chapter on probation, ceasing its pledging activities immediately and developing a new pledging process.”

“We know it was in poor taste,” Lanpher said of the incident. “We don’t advocate what they said. We believe that the chapter’s behavior has changed.”

According to the national organization’s website — which boasts photos of both presidents Bush — “DKE is the only fraternity chapter at Yale which has never gone inactive.” For now.

Check out the full letter text: Yale Daily News

Just trying to keep the brotherhood informed with society’s bullshit regulations. Not cool, just not cool.

Thoughts? Sound off in the comments below.

It’s not hazing. It’s brotherhood.

— DKE Pledges (Yale University)

Full story soon to come IN THE NEWS section.

Don’t forget to LIKE the brotherhood on Facebook!

It’s not hazing. It’s brotherhood.

Off the bat, let’s make this clear, fraternities aren’t cheap. I’m sure you’ll find one or two on campus that charge a hundred bucks to bring together a few guys, but let’s face it, that’s not a fraternity. If you’re going balls-to-the-wall, you’re going to have to pay for it one way or another. For most fraternities in the south, the mere yearly cost is atleast a thousand bucks. Not cheap, but for the benefits you’re given, it’s worth every penny. On the upper end of frat-houses, you’re looking at a few thousand bucks in yearly dues. Don’t get me started on sororities… those girls are pampered, but they sure as hell pay for it.

The difference between the cost of fraternity life as a brother and the cost of fraternity life as a pledge is extreme. When you’re a pledge, life doesn’t get much worse. Like always, I’m speaking for those fraternities at the top of the charts. Those that party hard, fuck bitches and live life to the fullest. Everyone else isn’t worthy of mentioning. Since we’re all about pledging, let’s focus on what exactly your money will go towards in your semester of fun. If you’re a #21 ideal pledge, you’ll learn quickly:

As a pledge, the monetary demands that will be put upon you are immense. Right off the bat, if a brother wants or needs something, a pledge is almost always responsible. While pledgeship varies with every fraternity on every campus, pledges will always have to fork over the cash in one way or another.

Vending Machine

Here are a few examples. First off, some fraternities require pledges to carry quarters, dollar bills, etc. in their pockets for brothers to use the vending machines. At any moment a brother can call a pledge for vending machine money. That’s just the tip of the iceberg. When it’s dinnertime, McDonalds is open 24/7. You get the picture. Partying tonight? Don’t put it past a brother to tell a pledge to go buy the liquor. Your ass mine-as-well swipe credit cards because you’ll be dishing out the money all semester.

If a brother is generous, he’ll throw in a few bucks. Other than your #54 big brother, don’t count of any up-front loans. Otherwise, a pledge has to fend for himself. There are stories of pledge classes holding car washes, bake sales, all of the classics you can think of in order to make ends meet during pledgeship. It’s a common reality that numerous pledges drop (quit) because they can’t afford it. Unfortunate, but it happens. Life goes on.

Gas Money

The biggest expense of pledgeship parallels that of designating driving. You’re a professional bitch-on-wheels for a semester, and no brother has any sympathy for how much money it takes to fill up your tank. With gas prices soaring, pledges are moaning. You’ll drive a brother to class, drive them to parties and shuttle girls back and forth from the fraternity house. You’ll have a scheduled set of driving hours, and will always have to drive on a rainy day. God forbid a brother gets wet on his way to class. Cha-ching.

Cigs & Dip

No matter what fraternity you’re pledging, there’s bound to be a handful of tobacco addicts. With cigarettes and dip serving as the majority, you’ll also see cigars, gum, condoms… you name it. Some pledges are required to hold cigarettes on them at all times. Other will have dip, gum and condoms. I mean, who knows when you’ll need a rubber? It’s call pledge-parenthood, a spin-off of planned-parenthood. Pledges not only protect you from drunk driving, they protect you from STD’s and child-support payments. Oh, the irony.

Bottom-Line Cost

Here’s a piece of advice, and a serious piece at that. When you’re walking around during #2 rush, don’t be afraid to ask a few questions. Talk to the brothers and get serious with them; ask them how much it’s going to cost you. They’ll most likely give you a bullshit low-ball number, but atleast it’s your starting point. It only goes up from there.

If you’re entering a top, social house, expect to spend a thousand. Base your expenses on how popular the house is, and what their reputation has been. While most rumors can be farfetched and ridiculous, some #59 fraternity stereotypes are right on the money. Don’t be afraid to ask around, it might make your decision ten times easier. No matter what, have a sit down with the old folks. You’re not going to be able to pay for it yourself. In the end, it’s all worth it. Four year to live it up, no matter the cost.

It’s not hazing. It’s brotherhood.

You really can’t argue this one. Check out the University of Missouri’s Greek community celebrate the little fucker’s death:

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It’s not hazing. It’s brotherhood.

The fraternity list-serve gives the brotherhood a universal form of communication. On a serious note, updates are sent out about upcoming events, rituals, etc. If there’s a #7 line-up for the pledges that night, the #57 pledge master will let you know through the list-serve. The upper-level executive guys in the house can let the brotherhood know when something important is coming up. Towards the end of the year, guys sell all their shit through emails. If you don’t get the picture already, the list-serve is a group email device that sends emails to each member of a group using one common email address. In other words, you’ll send an email to “SigEp@Gmail.com“, but that email will automatically be forwarded to each brother in the fraternity. It’s technology, get used to it.

On a lighter, more amusing note, the list-serve allows everyone in the brotherhood to laugh their ass off on a daily basis. With #30 fratty vocabulary galore, the more pictures, the better. If you can think of it, it’s probably already been sent over a fraternity list-serve. I’m talking about porn links, funny stories, videos, and the like. If there’s a deal at a restaurant down the street, you can let your brother’s know in a heart-beat. If you need back-up for a fight, there’s no better way to let everyone know. For most people, email is sent straight to their phones. There’s a few campuses that are using group text-messages as well to make communication even more efficient.

The list-serve can act as one of the many forms of #26 brother hazing. If a brother has been a douche-bag, feel free to call him out through an email. Bust his balls for fucking a fatty, or congratulate a brother for losing his virginity. Either way, let the brotherhood decide what’s worthy and what’s not.

Like all things fraternity-related, secrecy is key. You don’t want a girl to read the email that you sent out about you pounding her from behind the other night. That’s just not kosher. Even more so, you don’t want to leave evidence of hazing, hence #44 hazing visualized. On that note, check out Kappa Sigma’s leaked list-serve email that got ‘em kicked off campus. It’s a little lengthy, but definitely worth the read:

To the Distinguished Gentlemen of the Kappa Sigma Fraternity:

 

As I have mentioned I will be starting a weekly Gullet Report. In response to the Soft Report, I felt it necessary to offer a contrasting and more uplifting telegram. My theories and practices are elaborated in more detail in the body of this email.

 

Please send me all of your hook-ups in Tucker Max format (for those unfamiliar with this legend, google will suffice). These renditions should be elaborate and interesting. I want raw data on who fucks and who doesn’t. In conclusion the gullet report will strengthen brotherhood and help pin-point sorostitiutes more inclined to put-out. From my experience when a female goes Ksig shes typically repeats.

 

For your entertainment read on and pause for note taking. My hope is that ALL of our brothers will follow this creed with pride and distinction.

 

I have come to write this memo to you today to educate on the only life worth living, that of a Cocksman. A Cocksman is taught to live by the two most applicable principles I know: The Pie and the Gullet. You may already be lost in trying to comprehend this logic. Do not worry this is completely understandable. By the end of this memo, you will not only gain a greater understanding of what it means to live, but you will have embraced a lifestyle. However, in order for this to happen you first must know a couple key terms.

 

Note: I will refer to females as “targets”. They aren’t actual people like us men. Consequently, giving them a certain name or distinction is pointless.

 

Pie: A target’s vagina. Some of you may have heard phrases such as, twat, cooter, muff, snatch, poontang, cock pocket, DNA dumpster, fun hatch, cock sock, the fish flap, spunk-pot, whisker biscuit, or the rarely used, wizard’s sleeve. All these terms are interchangeable and fine to use. However, for the purpose of this memo, I will refer to a target’s vagina as pie.

 

Gullet: Usually refers to a target’s mouth and throat. Most often pertains to a target’s throat capacity and it’s ability to gobble cock. If a target is known to have a good gullet, it can deep-throat dick extremely well. My advice is to seek out this target early in the night. Good Gullet Girls (GGG) are always scooped up well before last call.

 

Grip: Refers to the tightness of a target’s pie. If a target is said to have good grip, your cock probably feels like it’s in a vice when you are deep inside it. If a target is said to have great grip, your cock probably feels like it got caught in a Chinese finger trap. Gentlemen, don’t let a target like that get away from you. Avoid the pie’s that are extremely meaty and resemble a cold cut combo from Subway. More often then not, if a target’s pie looks like a bag of roast beef on the outside, it’s probably a Cleveland Sideslapper.

 

Cleveland Sideslapper: An extremely loose pie. The target’s pie has become so loose because of overusage, the lips of the pie flap and slap it’s inner thigh as it walks.

 

Pie-Getters: A man that is possessed with getting his nut off. He exists solely to spread his seed in any pie that will have him.

 

R.D.A (Raw Dog Assassin): A man that refuses to wear condoms because no feeling on earth can compare to a warm piece of pie coming in contact with your cock. Let’s be honest, if it isn’t raw it isn’t real. Drawbacks of this philosophy are that you may have to visit the clinic more often than not, but a quick penicillin shot really isn’t that bad (trust me).

 

Loop n’ Doop: A target that is very easy to take down. All she takes is a good amount of liquor (loop) and she will be good to go for you to fuck her (doop). Be careful with loop n’ doops, because too much loop and they will get sick and be useless entities.

 

Guap n’ Drop: A target that is extremely difficult to take down. She probably doesn’t drink very much and she probably has a high socioeconomic status. Simple tactics wont impress her. It will take a good amount of effort and time to crack these. You are going to have to open up the wallet (guap) and spend (drop) a good amount on her to finally get to the pie. Better hope it has great grip for all your diligent work.

 

Defending the Gullet Report:
You may feel this is an unnecessary initiative. Gentlemen, you could not be more wrong. Gullet Reports only exist to help pie-getters get their nut more. It gives them the knowledge so they can operate as an efficient, calculated assassin. It also exists to call out the pie-getters who may fabricate stories sometimes or tend to exaggerate their sexual encounters. You all know who you are, and should be ashamed of your actions. There is nothing wrong with having a fatty on your record.

 

Also, sometimes targets that look like a Mack truck ran over their face have the greatest bodies and some outstanding grip. He who is without sin can cast the first stone, but he does not exist. Having a bad mark on your resume is a slight drawback of being a dedicated nut-getter. Shit happens. But own up to your disgrace, as you will only make the situation worse if you don’t take credit for dicking-down scum.

 

By now I assume some of you are wondering what constitutes a bad mark on your resume. To simplify the matter, I have come up with a rating system so strict that most of you will cringe when you actually figure out what your lifetime average really is. This scale was created because a friend of mine went on a spring break trip and came back claiming he fucked a 9. His defense was “she had to be a 9 man. She was the hottest girl I ever fucked.” That was when my friend and I decided to institute an absolute ranking system that could be universally used and implemented.

 

The scale is a simple 1-10 ranking system, with outliers existing up to a -5. Anything worse than that and I suggest you go find the nearest cliff and end your sorry putz existence. You don’t deserve to use your cock anymore and you don’t deserve to live your life. Moving on, I am sorry to break it to you but no one in our fraternity has ever fucked a 10. Probably only a handful have put down a 7. Society has inflated your perception and lowered your standards. My scale is absolute. It takes nothing else into account but pure physical beauty. Anything you can see with your eyes is fair game, however, a target does not get a higher ranking if it has “great grip” or a “great gullet.” How many times have you seen some sorry sap trying to justify fucking a poor piece of pie by saying “dude she gives great head” or “her pussy is so tight!” Many fatties and uglies do have great gullets and are particularly good at sex. They have to be more dedicated to their craft because no one would talk to them otherwise. Likewise, a target does not receive a reduced ranking if you get down to the pie and it resembles a slaughterhouse. It’s unfortunate, but poor qualities like that do not lower her physical beauty.

 

I would now like to take the time to explain the rating system in detail. I will not cover negatives because when you are trying to decide whether a target is a -3 or -2 that’s just sad for mankind. Moreover, since I do not personally know you I cannot be the judge of what pie you have fucked. I will offerer my guidance upon request because I consider my self a pie-getting veteran. My judgment is sound and I promise to give you my unbiased opinion. Seek my council in ranking a target, as initially this will be a difficult challenge for you.

 

To accumulate your lifetime average, have all the pies you have fucked verified by a brother who is also subject to these gullet reporting regulations. Then add up their ranks and divide by how many pies you have fucked. A good score is right around a 5.

 

To accumulate your “filth rating,” add up all the pieces of pie you have fucked that are a 3 or below and divide by how many pies you have fucked. Make this a percentage. For example, my filth rating is at 12%, but I have exceeded 50 pieces of pie. Not bad.

 

10- The likes of Marissa Miller and Megan Fox. No one will ever get this.
9- If any of you are lucky to get so close to perfection, feel blessed. If you fuck this up, you should be lynched. This is your ceiling.
8- See #7
7-Wife Status. Be careful not to fuck this up.
6-Date Status. Be careful when you cheat, but still cheat
5-Apply the 5×5 rule. Toot it 5 times, and then boot it. Move onto the next piece of pie.
4-One night stands, but they are fairly attractive. Should not be repeats.
3-The filth cut-off. These are not attractive women, but sadly many of you have fucked these.
2-Still filth. Still Pathetic.
1-Anything this close to 0 is bad. You better be 3 four lokos deep to justify this abomination
0-Let me just say from experience, when calculating your lifetime pie accumulation, throwing a 0 in the mix really hurts the average.

 

Additional Rules for a Cocksman

 

1.) Non-consent and rape are two different things. There is a fine line, so make sure not to cross it.
2.) A target should maintain the hair around her pie. It’s a matter of respect. Maintenance is preferred (I prefer pie that has been lasered increasing the aesthetics and feel).
3.) Do your research and find out what is a loop n’ doop target and what is a guap n’ drop target. Keep yourself busy by fucking loop n’ doops while working on a guap n’ drop on the side. It only makes perfect sense.
4.) When utilizing the loop power of 4 Lokos, be careful. A target on one 4 Loko is putting the odds in your favor of getting some pie. A target on two 4 Lokos is going to get sick and pass out. A target on three 4 Lokos leads to instances of litigation and lawsuits. Terms like “sexual assault” seem to be used in this case.

 

Pie Code

 

A pie code is essential to have so pie-getters can have a conversation in front of targets while talking about them and deciding which one to make a move on. The following references:

 

Blackberry: A black target
Blueberry Pie: half-black/half-white
Pumpkin Pie: A latin/mexican target
Pecan Pie: half-white/half-latin
Strawberry Pie: white target
Cherry pie: A young white target
Lemon Meringue: Asian target

 

Note: If you are so lucky to encounter a perfect piece of pie. I mean the grip is out of this world, it doesn’t look like hair ever existed in the region, and it tastes like strawberry shortcake, then you are allowed to refer to the pie as crème brulee. It must hit the tri-fecta to be considered for this great and honorable distinction.

 

*Don’t fuck middle-eastern targets. Exhibit some patriotism and have some pride. You want your cock smelling like falafel? Filth.

 

Do not recreate this email. This is for Kappa Sigmas. I will track you down and take your soul if you transmit this email to anyone outside our brotherhood.

 

- NAME/RIDICULOUS NICKNAMES REDACTED

Now that’s a ridiculous email. Props to the author for coming up with that one. Either way, Kappa Sigma got fucked in the long-run. More the reason to preserve the secrecy. Let’s keep the dream alive, shall we? The list-serve, among many other things, keeps us above and beyond the pitiful lives of #18 god damn independents. Let’s face it, we’re down the lines of #52 Charlie Sheen: always winning.

It’s not hazing. It’s brotherhood.

With almost every fraternity and sorority on the list, forums and blogs around the internet gave way to an interesting compilation of “spin” names for each house. Ranging from serious to downright nasty, each house (both fraternities and sororities) gets a few unique definitions. We’ll start with sororities, then work our way to fraternities. Some of the names have legend numbers attached to them. These numbers correlate to specific universities listed at the very bottom. Check out the list below:

Greek Letters	Real Names		Spin Names
	Alpha Gamma Delta		All Go Down Any Guy’s Dick Aids God Dammit Alpha Grabba Doughnut 21 Wham, Bam, Thank-You ‘Gam Alpha Gamma Dogs All God’s Dogs Alpha Grabba Ho Always Gettin’ Drunk Alpha Grabba Dick Always Going Down Athens Guard Dogs 88 Always Going for Doughnuts Alpha Glam 112 Alpha Slam 112 All Gobble Dicks 88

Alpha Delta Pi

Shady Pi
Ade A Pie ¹
Alabama Dog Pound ⁸
Ass Pie ¹
Eighty pound thighs ¹⁰⁶
ADPie Pie? Pie? Who said pie? ¹⁴
80 Pies
After Dinner Peices of pie
Always Down to Party ¹⁴
alpha delta cutie pi
AD Crossed eye ¹²
Always Devouring Pie ⁸⁵
Arizona Dog Pound ³
ADPi…did you say pie? ¹⁴
Always Doin’ Pikes ⁹⁰
Easy As Pie ⁷⁴
Ass Dick Pussy
80 proof ²⁸
Arkansas Dog Pound ⁹⁵
CrossEyedPi
ADGuy -6
80 pound thighs

Alpha Epsilon Phi

A E High
Always Eating Food
A E Fat
A E Thigh
Alaph Betsilon Phi -11
Ate a Pie -82

Alpha Kappa Delta Phi

Me Sooooo Horny - 23
Shady Phis, Spreads their thighs
KDPhis spread them thighs for them lambda guys - 23

Alpha Xi Delta

All Zippers Down ³⁶
Alpha Sleeze
Easy D’s
Alpha Disease
Chubbie Fuzzies
A Z Drunk ¹²⁵

Alpha Omicron Pi

Apes On Parade
Army of Pigs
Amimals On Parade
AO Piggies
Always Open Thighs
Ate a Whole Pie ⁵⁴
AO Fat Thigh ¹²
Eat a Pie
A O Poop ²¹
Yayo Pi ⁹³
Always Open Pussies ⁹⁹
A O WHY???  ⁸³
Animals On Parade ⁵⁴
Hey Hoe Pie ⁵⁴
A O Ate a Pie ⁹⁸
A O PERFECT ⁸

Alpha Sigma Rho

Asian and Stuckup Richgirls ¹⁰⁰
The nerds ¹⁰⁰
All Science-major Republicans ¹⁰⁰
White washed asian girls ¹⁰⁰

Alpha Sigma Tau

Can’t spell nASTy without AST ⁷
nASTy ⁷
Nothing goes down faster than an anchor.

Alpha Phi

All For Free
Alpha Phis do it on their knees
Jersey Chasers ⁴²
Alpha Flea
A Fatso
Alpha Fats ¹²
Alpha Feed Me
Fuck an A Phi, Marry a Phi Mu ¹⁰⁴
Alpha Phi – Get HPV ¹¹²
Alpha Fat
Alpha Phellatio ²⁸
If it burns when u pee its from an Alpha Phi ³²
Alpha Phiyotch
Alpha Feces ³²

Alpha Chi Omega

A Chi Ho ²³, ¹²
Alpha Christ ⁸
Alchy O’s
Aching Holes
Almost Chi O ¹⁰
Alpha to Omega ⁴⁴
Alcoholic Chi O’s ⁶⁰
Moo Cows ⁷⁶
A Chi Orexic ¹²
Beginning to End through Christ
Alpha Chi O’Model ⁸³
A Chi Blow
A Chi Snow
Alphaholics ¹¹
All cunts open
All clearly hoes

Gamma Gamma Delta

Gotta Grab a Donut

Gamma Phi Beta

Jamma Vi-brator ¹³
Can’t Get a Date-a ¹
Gamma High
Gotta use a Vibrata’ ¹⁴
Gamma High Beta (4:20) ¹
Gamma Phi Busted
Gamma Phi Bitches
Rob’s Ribs
Grabba Thigh Beta
Gamma Vibrator
Wish I Was a Theta ⁸⁵

Delta Gamma

Dirty Girls
Dick Grabbers ¹⁰⁸, ^{77 102}
Daughters of Christ
DGs go down faster than their anchors
Can’t spell “dog” without “dg”
Dick Garage ¹²
Daughters of God
Delta Glamour ²⁵
Damn Gorgeous ²⁵
Hot Damn Delta Gam ⁴³
Delta Grande ⁵¹
Discharge Guzzlers
Drama Gamma
Dyke girls ¹
Delta gorilla ³⁷
Drunk Girls ¹⁰²
Dumb Girls
Douch Gobblers
Ingrates ³⁸
Anchors pull them down to their knees ¹⁴
STDg ⁷⁷
Nothing goes down faster than an anchor
They go down faster than their anchor ⁷⁸
Dumped Girl
Dirty Gramma ¹²
Don’t waste your timma ¹²
Delta Gamarexic
Delta Drama ¹²
Daddy Gimme ⁹⁴
Dick Garages ²³
Dirty Gs ²⁵
Nothing Goes down quicker than an anchor
Delta Grab a Pi Kapp’s Dick ⁶⁹

Delta Delta Delta

Tri Delt…We Have!
If you can’t get a date by 8 try delt!
3d
Tri Delts, Everyone else has
Tri delt tried them all ¹¹
“Do the Dirty Dance”
Fly High on a Tridelts Thigh
Triple Nipples ²⁶
Tri Delt — Who hasn’t? ³⁰
3 times better with just one letter ¹²
Father, Son, Holy Ghost ⁴⁶
STD Slutty Tri Delts
If you can’t get laid, tri-Delt ²⁸
Dumb Dirty Dogs
Stepford Wives
Try delta, everyone else has ⁷²
Don’t try the others, try delt
Tri delt, or don’t try at all
Coke Snorters ⁷⁶
TriDelt Or Don’t Tri At All
Deltalicious ¹²
DDD-Cup Size ¹²
Fuck a DG, date a phi, marry a DDD ¹²
Have you “felta delta” ³
Darling Dancing Divas
Drug Dealing DramaQueen ⁵³
Can I help ya help ya help ya ⁹⁵
Tri Delta into Oblivion
Dogs, Dorks, and Dykes ¹²
TriDelta, Greek for TriUgly ¹²
Dorks, Dogs and Disease ¹²
Have you tried a tri-delt? ²⁸
Try Delta! Everybody else has… ¹⁰⁸
Life is better in 3D
Tri-Fecta of Doom ¹³

Delta Zeta

Easy DZs ²
Dog Zone
Date Zone
Drama Zeta
Discovery Zone
Diseases
Sleazy DZs
Daughters of Zio ¹¹
Daughters of Zion ³⁰
DZ Turtles once on their back their Fucked
Show ‘em the green, they show you the pink ⁹⁴
DZ, Do Me Please ²⁵
EZ-DZ ¹²⁵
Greek Goddesses
Daughters of Zeus ⁷⁰

Delta Phi Epsilon

Daddy Pays For Everything
The Dog Pound
Drama Phi Epsilon
Dogs, Pigs, and Elephants ²⁸
Reefer Deephers ¹¹
Delta Phi Hairsalon ¹¹
Donkey Fucked an Elephant ²⁸
D-Phi-Easy
Delta Fly Sexilon ¹²¹
Beefers
Deeper deephers
D Phi Sleez
Queefers ⁹⁸

Zeta Tau Alpha

Zits, Tits, and Ass ³⁵
Zeus the Almighty ⁴⁸
Zits, tits, & armpits
Zoo Trained Animals
Hold my crown while i go down ²⁵
Zoo Trained Animals
Queens of Greeks

Theta Kappa Chi

Theta kappa crazy ¹¹¹
Theta kappa line ¹¹¹

Kappa Alpha Theta

Thick theta ⁵⁷
Fat Kats ⁶²
Gotta Date-A Theta
Kappa All-Pathetic ⁶²
Katcha AIDS Then-Die-Ah ⁸³
Krappa Alfalfa Theta
I think I’d rather masturbata ³⁸
KAO KAO ITS OFF TO BED WE GO ⁶¹
Thetah Potatah
Kappa Overrated ⁴¹
KAT Kites And Trolls
Theta Grata Your Nerves ¹
Kappa Wanna Kill Them ⁸³
Can’t Get a Key? Go for a Kite.
Love to Lay-a Theta ²²
Pledge Theta? Forgeta!!!
Kappa Alpha Trolls ¹³

Kappa Delta

Keg Drainers ⁶
Killer Dogs ¹
Kampus Dogs ¹⁹, ¹⁰⁸
KD definetly not for me ³³
Kappa Dyke ³⁴
King’s Daughters ³⁰, ¹⁰⁸
Kampus drunks ⁵¹
KD Ladies
Fuck a Phi, date a DG, mary a KD
Kum Dumpsters ³⁸
Klans Daughters ⁸⁸
Katherine’s Daughters
Klan’s Dogs
Klan
Koke Dealers ⁵³
Kookies and Doughnuts ¹⁰⁸
Cracka Delta ⁸³
KD Cows ³³
Kitchen Deltas ⁶⁹

Kappa Kappa Gamma

Kappa Kappa Gucci
Visa Visa Mastercard ¹⁴
Katcha Katcha Gonorrhea
Kappa Kappa Grandma
Cutta Cutta Gramma ⁸
Daddy Daddy Please ⁹
Killa Killa Gorillas ²⁵
Ku Klux Girls
Kappa Kappa Gimmie ¹³
Krappa Krappa Cramma
kappa kappa Tiffany’s ¹⁸
Krispy Kream Grabbers ¹⁰
Kappa Half-a Gram-a ¹²
Quadruple Size Me ²³
Krispy Kream Kappa ²³
Keys to the Kingdom of God ³⁰
Kappa Kappa Slammin! ⁶³
Kappa Kappa Coke-ah
Krappa
Kappa Kappa Cow
Pi Phi n’ Theta Wannabes ¹
Kappa Kappa Cattle
Klappa Klappa Gonorrhea
Cocaine On a Key
Daddy Daddy Buy Me
Can’t be a DG? Settle for KKG
KKG- goes down on their knees
Can’t get a kite or arrow, #3 get a key
Kuppa Kuppa Granola ⁹¹
Klassy Klassy Girls ²⁵
Fuck a DPhiE, Date an ADPi, Marry a KappaFuc
Hot damn, Kappa Gamm
Cattle Cattle Comming
Kappa Kramma Cupcakes
KappaGam, Thank you, Ma’m
Kappa – Greek for “fat “
KKG Ugly
Greek for “Big Piggies “
Coke whores with keys
Koka koka whores on their knees
Greek for Makka Meaa Pukka
Katty Katty Goober
Killa Killa Godzilla
Kappa Keeping Eating
Kappa Kappa Gobble Gooble
Kkg always on their knees
Kappa Kappa Gorillas ²⁵
Krispy Kreme Gorillas ²⁵
Keepa Fatta Girls
Kappa Kappa Gross
Kappa Kappa Damma I pledged the wrong house
Kappa Kramma Gravy with a key
Kappa Notta Quota ¹³
Kappa Kappa Fugly
Kappa Sucka Cocka
King kong’s gootch
Krusty kootchie giants

Lambda Theta Alpha

Lonha Torta Nu ¹

Lambda Theta Nu

Lambda Theta Nalpha ¹

Pi Beta Phi

Makes the Cum Fly
Pry Open My Thighs ¹⁴
Shoot It In Her Eye
Pry Thighs
Plump but Pretty ⁵¹
Phi Beta Spread a Thigh ⁵⁵
Pi High (coke whores) ¹
Unzip your fly, here comes Pi Phi
Fuck a ADpi, date a DG, marry a pi phi
pi beta coke bitches
Pi Beta Fruit Fly ¹²
Pi Beta Rich Bitch
Pi Blonde Bitch ⁹¹
Pretty Blonde Prisses
Pi Beta Phi- Bitches till they Die
Pi Phi Princess
Pi Phi – Too Snobby to Even Try ⁹¹
Pi Beta Plastic
Pi Beta Preppy
Pi Beta Phine
Pi Beta Phi noses in the sky
Pi Beta Bulgari ¹
Pi Beta Cash ¹⁰⁰
Fry Burger Fry
Pi Beta Fat
Pi Beta Pretty
Pi Beta Phi, pleasing to the eye
All Gobble Dicks ⁸⁸
Pi Beta Billions
Pi Beta Perfect
Pi Make’m Cry
Daddy bought my wings ¹⁰⁰
Mile-Wide Thighs
Pi Beta WASP
Pi Beta Whitebread
Pi Beta Prissy
Pi Beta WASP
Pi Phis, Hi Hi “Daddy not Rich?” Bye Bye
Pi fat n ugly
Pretty Bitchy Phi
Pi Beta Popular
Pi Beta Priss
Pi Beta Whitebread
Pi Beta WASP
Pi Quota High
Pi “Not Rich?” Bye ⁹¹
Pi Better Than Thy ⁹¹
Pi Beta Pearls..and rings, and things Pi Beta BMW
Pike Whores
Pi Beta Udon’t Eat
Pi Buy Pearls
I Beta you get dropped
Pi Beta Beemer
Pi Beta Protestant ⁷⁷
Pi Beta Prim
I Beta “Precious? ⁸⁸

Sigma Gamma Rho

Sigma Gamma Ho ¹¹⁰

Sigma Delta Tau

Spend Daddies Trillions
Stumpy Dumpy Trolls
Can’t spell STD without Sigma Delta Tau
Seldom Dated Twice
Suck Don’t Talk
Slutty Daughters of the Torah
Sixty Dirty Twats ⁵⁴
Same Damn Tramps ⁸²
Slutty Dick Takers ⁸²
Sdt’s have std’s ⁹²
JAPs ¹¹⁴
Secret Daughters of the Torah

Sigma Kappa

Sigma Cattle ²³, ¹⁰²
Sigma Kattle ¹⁰²
Smegma crappa
St. Katherine ³¹
Salvation to the Kingdom
Single Koke Whore
Enigma Kappa
Sigma Krappa ¹²
Stupid Kunts ⁸²
You can’t spell skank without an SK ¹⁰³
Salvation thru the King
Servants of the King
Sisters of the King ³¹
Sisters in the Kingdom
Krispy Kreme Girls ¹⁰²
Slutty Kappa ⁹⁸
You can’t spell skank without an SK ⁶¹
Snakey K ⁸⁵

Sigma Sigma Sigma

Tri Pigs ⁶⁵
Try Sig everyone else has
Several Scorn Sisters
Rejected Sigma Kappa’s ³⁵
Sigma Kappa rejects!
Tri Nazi
Tri nig ¹³⁵
Tri stigma ¹³⁵

Phi Lambda Rho

Fuck Any Bro ¹

Phi Mu

Phi-mooo ¹⁰
Father Mark
Phi Mu, Phi Mu, it’s off to bed with you
I’d rather eat a Zeta than fuck a Phi Mu ³⁰ Rattle Rattle Here Comes the Cattle ¹³²

Phi Sigma Sigma

Phi Piggy Piggy
Phi Stickme Stickme
Fuck, Suck, Suck
Phi Slutma Slutma
Phi *SNIFF* *SNIFF* ¹¹⁹
Phi Sig Sucks a lot ⁹⁸
Phi Syphilis
phi syphilis syphilis ⁹⁸
Phi Singa Singa ⁹⁸

Chi Omega

Chi Ho’s
Order of Christ ¹
Chi O Chi O, its off to bed we go… ¹¹
Christ Omegas
Classy Chi-O’s
Cult omega ⁵¹
Cow Omega
Can eat U under the table!
Chi-o chi-o Chi-o I can blow ³⁵
My daddy’s rich and I’m a bitch, chi ho
Coffin Owners ¹⁹
Marry a chi-o ⁵¹ Chi Hoe’s ¹²⁶

Fraternities:

Alpha Delta Phi

Gay D P ⁵
Shady Phi
Alpha Douche ⁵⁴

Alpha Epsilon Pi

Apes
All Eat Penis
Gay E Pi ¹¹
A E Gay ¹¹
Always Eating Penis
AEPhags ¹¹
A-E Mazeltov! ²³

Alpha Kappa Lambda

All Kinds of Losers
Always Keep Losing
All Kampus Losers
A.K.Who? ⁶²
Awful Krappy Laya

Alpha Tau Omega

Asshole Training Organization
Sensitive guys with gigantic cocks ¹²
Gay T O
Can’t Spell “faggot” without ATO ²¹
ATO not the way to go ³³
Alpha Snow ¹⁰
Alpha to Omega ⁴⁵
Alpha Tool Omega ⁵³
Alcohol Omega
Never ever go ATO ⁸⁵
Beginning to End
All Windows Potato Gunned ²⁸
A-T-Polo ¹¹
A-T-M’s ¹¹
A T ZERO
A-T-Blow ³⁸
All together one
ATBro ⁶
AT Oh my god I joined the wrong fraternity! ¹²⁰
ATO-No means No!! ¹³⁰

Alpha Chi Rho

Alpha I’ma Hoe
Crows

Beta Theta Pi

Beta Rape-a-date-a ¹
Don’t Date a Beta
Beta Theta Wanna Rape Ya
Beta Date-a Guy ³⁰
Beta Theta ain’t got no Pie ⁸
Bully The Pledges ⁵⁹
Beta Date a Guy ⁵³
Mr. Nice Guys ⁷⁶
Beat off Eleven ⁸
Beta Theta Thug
Beta Date-a Rape-a
Bet I eat a Pi
Beta Who? ⁹⁷
Beta Theater Bi
Beta Theta Hate-a-Jew ²⁸
Beta Theta HIGH
Bake potatoe pie ⁹⁸
FIJI Rejects
Loser Beta’s
Beta Nerd
 

Gamma Beta

Gorgeous Boys ¹⁰⁰
Good Boys ¹⁰⁰
Gay Boys
Lambda Rejects
Fagga Beta
No Game-a Beta

Delta Kappa Epsilon

If you can’t go Greek, Go DKE ⁵⁴
Dick and Kunt Everywhere
Dicks ³⁸
Goat Fvckers ⁷⁴
You can’t spell “dickhead” without DKE ⁸¹
Delta Kappa Who? ¹²
Delta Krappa get me outta here
Dont Kiss ‘Em
If you ain’t DKE, you ain’t SHIT ²⁸
The Secrets ¹¹³
Delta Kappa Unda Grounda ¹¹³
MC Dekes ¹¹³

Delta Lambda Phi

Dick Loving Phags

Delta Sigma Phi

Delta Cigarettes
Delta Sigma Fags
Delta Sketch

Delta Tau Delta

Down Town Drunks
Dah Tee Dah ⁸
Down Town Daddies ⁸
Dorks ’til Death ¹⁶
Drink ‘Til Dawn
Deep Throat Dicks
Delta thug delta
Dudes Touching Dudes ²⁹
Dick to Dick
Dorks That Drink ⁵⁴
Dopes Taking Dope
Dicks Till Death ⁸⁰
Dicks Taste Delicious
Dot to Dots ²²

Delta Upsilon

Delta Oops I Joined the Wrong Fraternity
Delta Oops I Bid ²¹
Delta Ups ⁵²
Cant Spell Douschebag witout DU ⁵³
Can’t spell douche without DU ⁵³
Dumb and Useless ⁵³
Delta “ups” i lost my load ⁵³
Delta a bid to everyone on campus ⁵³
Douche Users ⁵³
Delta Oops I Burnt My House Down ¹²²
Delta “Oops I signed” ³²

Delta Chi

Eat A Guy
Felt-a-guy
We share our girls with all the guys! ⁸⁵
The Derivative House ²⁸

Delta Psi

Delta Spy ³⁸

Zeta Beta Tau

Zainey Bagel Throwers
Zero Bitches There
Zillions, Billions & Trillions ¹
Zero Babes Tonight ⁷
Zero, But Trying ⁷
Zion Bank and Trust
Zizzle Bizzle Tizzle ⁵⁰
Sweet Livin’ ⁵⁰
Zayin BaTahat (Hebrew for “dick in the ass”)
Your fave fraternity’s fave fraternity ⁵⁰
Zeroes Between the Thighs
ZBTerrible ¹¹

Zeta Psi

Zeta High ⁸¹
Zeta Psycho ⁸¹
ZTA guys ¹³⁵

Theta Delta Chi

Oaxaca ¹
Theta Drug ⁵⁴
Thumpty  ⁵⁴
Thick Dick Coercion ⁷⁸

Theta Xi

The Taxi ¹
Theta Hi ¹
They’re back! ⁴⁵
The Zoo ⁶⁴

Theta Chi

Date a guy ¹⁷, ²⁵, ⁴⁰
Ate-A Guy ⁵³
Date-a-guy in Theta Chi ¹¹
Kappa Sig Ruled your Mom Theta Chi fucks Guys ¹²⁵
Rather Die than be in Theta Chi
Date a guy ¹³²

Kappa Alpha

Kappa Kappa Kappa ¹⁰
The Kappa Alpha Disorder ¹¹
Knights of Alcohol ¹⁷
King Arthur
Gay A
Kill Africa
K-yAy ⁷⁸
Ku Klux Kappa Alpha ²²

Kappa Delta Rho

Kappa Dorka Rho
Kappa Date Rape ⁴⁰
You can’t spell DORK without KDR
Can’t Spell Drunk without KDR ³⁶
Shady-R ⁷⁰
GayDR ⁵⁴

Kappa Kappa Kappa

KKK ¹⁰⁵

Kappa Sigma

Kappa Sketch28
Kappa Scum
Kappa Sexy
Kappa Schwag ²¹
Pack A Cig ²³
Kock Suckers ²³
Kappa Shwig ²³
Squids
Squeeks ³⁹
K Sig ⁴³
Kappa Faggot ⁵⁸
Kap A Nig ³⁷
Kappa Slugga ²¹
Moids ⁷¹
Krappy Sigs ⁸⁶
King’s Sons
Tap a keg ⁹⁵
Kappa Pig ⁹⁵
Knights of Satan ²³
Coca Sig
Tappa Keg ⁹⁵
Kappa Swig ⁹⁵
Take a Swig ⁹⁵
COCKSUCKERS
Fag bags
Kappa Smegma
Klansmen’s sons ¹²⁹
Kappa nig ¹³⁵

Lambda Phi Epsilon

Lambda Phi Who Gives a Fuck ¹²
L phi E..you know

Lambda Chi

Ramda Guy ⁸
Lambda AlQueda ⁵³

Lambda Chi Alpha

Lambda Al Queida ⁵³
Rammed A Guy ⁵⁴
Lambda Bi
Lambda Chi Losers ⁹⁸
Lamb Chops ²⁸
Lame-da Chi

Pi Alpha Phi

Fruits
Pineapples

Pi Kappa Alpha

If fags you like, uh pledge pi ka ³³
Princes of King Authur ⁴⁷
Packers ⁴⁹
Pretty Boys ⁴⁹
Beat up pussy lovers ⁴⁹
Date Rape Druggers ⁴⁹
Pi Sucka My Alpha ⁴⁹
Fuckwads ⁵⁶
Fuckstains ⁵⁶
Packa-ass ⁵⁶
Worst Frat Ever ⁵⁶
Pi Kappa Anyone ⁶⁴¹²⁵
Steroids, Steroids, Steroids ⁶⁶
Sign your name.. your a brother ⁶⁷
Principles of King Arthur ⁹⁹
Kappa Sig Owns You
We lift our weights and rape our dates ⁸⁶
Big Gay K ²⁵
Pi Kapp Almost ⁹⁸
Fucktards ¹²⁵
Girls who like girls are dykes, boys who like boys are pike

Pi Kappa Phi

Pi Phi for boys ¹²
Pi Scraps ²¹
Pi Phis for guys
Kappa Sig Screwed your Grandma
Pi Whack ⁹⁸
Pi Phis For Guys
Pi Kock (3.14 inches) ¹⁰⁹
Puts Kocks in Pledges
Tools ⁵⁴
Fuckin’ Guy Phi ⁶
Pi Kappa Fag ⁹⁸
Queer Pack’o Guys
Pi Crap
Pi Fuck a Guy

Pi Lambda Phi

Penis Lovers ¹⁰
Pi Lame ¹¹

Sigma Alpha Epsilon

Same Assholes Everywhere ³⁰
Sleep And Eat
Sexual Assault Expected ¹⁵
Sigma Phi Gravity Bong ⁸
SAE – Somebody, Anybody, Everybody
Shady and Easy
Sons of Adam and Eve ²⁴
Standards above excellence ²⁷
Say Bro ¹²
Sex Above Everything
S – Gay – E ¹
Short Assholes Everywhere
Suck ALL Erections ⁶⁹
Sexually Ambiguous Entities
Snort almost everything ⁷²
Sigma Alpha Everyone ⁵⁴
Someone, Anyone, Everyone! ⁵⁴
Steroids and Estrogen ²
Sigma Alpha Al Qaeda ²³
Cheese ²³
Cheesers ²³
SAE = Stupid and Egotisical
Sons of A bitchEs
Are you a douche? Rush us, dude! ¹¹⁷
Sigma Ass Eaters ³⁰
Sigma Alpha Hairsalon ⁶⁴,¹

Sigma Alpha Mu

Single Asian Male ¹²
Somebody Accepted Me
Sigma Alpha Jew
Sigma Alpha Who?
Sammy I Gay ²⁸
Sigma Alpha Moo! ⁸⁶

Sigma Nu

Sigma No No
Sigma Nerds ³⁸
Saint Nicholas ³⁴
SigmaNure ³⁷
Fuckin Nuers ⁴²
Sigma Zoo ¹⁷
Sigma Who??
Sigma Nubs ⁸
Snoozers ⁸⁰
Sigma nuisance ⁹²
Kappa Sig’s Bitches
Snookum Ninjas
Sigma Douche
Sigma Nobody
Sigma Chunt ¹¹⁶
Nu Money ¹¹⁸
Sigma Who will ever come to our parties?

Sigma Pi

Girls Gone Bye ²³
Sigma Pissed I joined this frat ⁷⁵
Stigma Pi ⁷⁵
Snegma Pie ⁹⁰
Sigma Poor
Sigma No Money
Steak and Carrots
Shit Pi ¹
Sigma Lie ¹²³
Sigma High ¹²³
Sigma Why ¹²³

Sigma Tau Gamma

Super Tough Guys ²²
Sig Tool ⁸⁶
Sex To Give ⁹⁴
Squid tau ⁹⁶

Sigma Phi Epsilon

Sigma Phi Hair salon
Sigma Assrammers ⁴
Seldomly Dated Twice
Spenises
Sigma Phi Everyone ²⁰,¹¹⁵
Suckuh Faggots Epsilon ⁴
Squids ⁶⁸
Spik Ep ⁵³
The Tool House ⁵³
Sigma Fag Epsilon
Sigma Women ²⁶
The Women ²⁶
Women of SIGMA PHI EPSILON! ²⁶
Speeeeeee ⁴⁶
The Gayest Fraternity on Earth ²³
Sig-gay ⁹⁸
Sigma Fag Hair Salon ¹²⁴
Sign Phucking Everyone ³²

Sigma Chi

Sons of Christ
Fucking Machis
Sigmachees
Sigs
Sig machi ⁵¹
Sigma high ⁵¹
The Storks ⁵¹
Sig Machee ⁵¹
Orlando’s Gayest ¹¹
Sigma Coke
Cigs and Cocaine
Sig Heils
Sigma Who? ⁷⁴
Homo chi ⁸⁹
Mochi ⁸⁹
Moke ⁸⁹
Swigma Chi ⁹⁵
Eat X
Sig Nachos
Sucked-a-guy
Candy Chis ¹⁰¹
Candyass Chis ¹⁰¹
Sigma Die ³²
Fucked-A-Guy
Smegma Chi ⁸⁵
Sigma Cry ¹²²

Tau Kappa Epsilon

If you can’t go Greek, go Teke ¹⁰
Freek-a-Teek ³³
Not Tekes, GEEKS! ¹¹
Tau Kappa Everyone
Cool Tool Castle ⁵³
Teke it in the ass
TKE it in the ass ⁸⁴
Tappa Kegga Easy ⁵³
TKE’s aren’t Greeks! ⁸³
If you can’t go DKE, go TKE
If you can’t go Teke, go home ³³
Tau Kappa Drinks-a-lot ⁹⁸

Phi Alpha Gamma

The Fag ¹
Phag

Phi Gamma Delta

FeeeeeGeeeee
F1-J1 Experimental Fraternity
Who The Hell Cares ²³
FineGuys ²³
Fag-Gee
Phi Gamma Rapist ⁶²
Phi Gamma Butt Slamma ⁶⁶
Pot Heads ⁷⁶
Fight Gram ⁸
Phi Drama Delta ¹²
Squeegee
F1J1 Wouldn’t want to be one
Phi Gamma Douche-bag Beta Rejects
Just Nerds ⁹⁸
Phi Gamma DateRape ³²
FeeGay ¹²⁷
Fijinas
Phi gram ¹³⁵

Phi Delta Theta

Dry-Delt ¹⁷
Try Phi Delt if have a big belt ²³
High Delta ¹⁴
Phi Domino’s Pizza ⁸¹
Fidelt Douchebags ⁵³
Fag Delt
Phi-Dry  ⁵⁴
Phi High ⁸
Beta Theta Pi rejects ¹²⁸
Phi Del Castro ¹³¹

Phi Kappa Sigma

Phake Kappa Sigma

Phi Kappa Tau

Phi Tards
Phi Tool
Fine and Tall ⁶⁷
High Taus
Fellowship Knowledge Truth
Ta dau ¹²⁰

Phi Kappa Psi

Fee-Cee ²³, ⁴¹
Phi Psi Fuck-ups ¹⁴
Feces

Phi Sigma Kappa

Die Pig ¹⁰⁷

Chi Phi

Chi High
Chipsies ³⁸
How High?

Psi Upsilon

Psi Opps I pledged Psi Upsilon
Psi Oops I rushed the wrong frat ²⁸
Psi Who? ⁷⁴

Omega Sigma Tau

oooEoooEooo

ACACIA

A-gay-cia ⁹⁶
A-cock-ia ⁵⁴

Alpha Sigma Phi

Alpha nig ¹³²

Phi Theta Kappa

Phi Theta Krappa ⁷⁹

Legend

All the credit goes to the guys at The Spin Zone for the research.

Think of any names not on the list? I’m sure somebody’s pissed off after reading this. Sound off in the comments below…

It’s not hazing. It’s brotherhood.

While stereotypes are (for the most part) out of the control of any fraternity, they’re not always far off. In other words, if ATO (also known as AT-Blow) is known for their constant lines of coke, the stereotype must’ve originated somewhere. Each fraternity on each campus owns its own reputation, so by no means is one Sigma Chi stereotype the same as another Sigma Chi at a different university. It’s always amusing to check out the other chapters of your fraternity around the country. Your hard-ass, top-tier party fraternity might be the local math-club at another small college. Let’s not forget that our fraternities (nationally) were founded upon things other than alcohol and parties. Crazy, I know.

While #33 pledgeship is a party for most (legitimate) fraternities, let’s not forget about the endless professional fraternities out there. From business to medicine, fraternities can encompass any form of unified group you can think of. While our typical #30 fratty vocabulary won’t slide in these fraternities, atleast now you know we’re not all wastes of life. But hey, who ever said being a waste of life in college is a bad thing?

Let’s take a look at some of the more typical stereotypes of fraternity guys on a large university campus. Sorry small guys, no one cares about you:

Southern Class

If you’re from the south, or haven’t had your head buried in the sand, you know what I’m talking about. The typical southern frat guy symbolizes all that is southern class. #53 Pledge attire serves as your daily life attire. I’m talking about Polo shirts, Khaki pants, Costa’s, a visor and boat shoes (preferably Sperry’s). They’re not muscular, but have developed a quality beer belly. Shirts always tucked in; no socks with the boat shoes.

Don’t be fooled by their southern dress. Their partying habits may me masked by a quality koozie, but they’ll kick your ass in a drinking contest any day of the week. Tailgating for football games are key, and nothing but a truck is parked out back. Country music: all day, every day. It’s the southern stereotype. You’ve gotta love it.

Guidos

Here’s the opposite of southern class. In the south, they’re all from Miami. In the north, these guys are way more prevalent. Jersey Shore, anybody? There’s nothing more important than working out, taking steroids, and then working out again. But seriously, they’re always jacked. Tank tops and gym shorts do the trick, and almost all of them are athletes. They pull the hottest chicks, and never really act like they give a fuck.

They’re what we call fist-pumpers. Country music? Fuck no. Techno and raves all night long. Rap isn’t far behind, but let’s not forget about the endless supply of hair gel. Example: #22 Frat life reality TV: all of Jersey Shore (most notably, Pauly D). In almost every large university, you’ve got to have the Guido frat.

Everyone Else

The rest are tough to explain. You can have the far-winged southerns who BBQ every day, lift their trucks and dip while sleeping: uber-southerns. Lax guys are making their presence known in the north, but have yet to make the sport popular down south. In most cases, there are countless houses that try and match the stereotype of one of the above, but fail to do so. There’s the geek fraternity who participates in every philanthropy and campus organization, and then there’s the all-black frats. There’s a fraternity for everybody. There are frats who are known for being chubby: perfection for the #10 token fat pledge. Lastly, there’s always a #20 GDI cult that calls themselves a fraternity. You know what I’m talking about.

Let’s get this straight: there are a shit-ton of fraternity stereotypes, some true and some false. If you’ve heard about one, then it probably exists somewhere. As a college life lesson, just understand that not all fraternities are made equal. They’re not all what you think they are. Most importantly, there’s always a fraternity for you. No fucking excuses to be a #20 god damn independent.

It’s not hazing. It’s brotherhood.

]]> http://pledgingsucks.com/fraternity-stereotypes/feed 5 http://pledgingsucks.com/qotd21?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=qotd21 http://pledgingsucks.com/qotd21#comments Fri, 22 Apr 2011 23:33:41 +0000 PledgeMaster http://pledgingsucks.com/?p=1883 “There’s always a pledge class bitch: the guy no one likes, the same guy that every brother fucks with the most.”

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PledgeMaster@PledgingSucks.com

It’s not hazing. It’s brotherhood.

We’ve rounded up a few articles to breeze over. The University of Michigan, University of Indiana, Cornell University and several others have let go of their SAE chapter due to some form of hazing allegations:

University of Michigan

The University of Michigan’s chapter of Sigma Alpha Epsilon has been expelled after hazing allegations, the Michigan Daily reports. The fraternity had previously been on suspension since early Feb.

The Daily has more:

The fraternity’s suspension came after an e-mail was sent to the University’s Office of Greek Life from a parent who disclosed various hazing activities — like forcing fraternity pledges to perform physical tests on while members shouted and threw tennis balls at them — her son was forced to endure as an SAE pledge.On March 7, the national organization made public its choice to maintain the University chapter — though it will be kept under “colony status” starting in the fall, according to the press release.

According to e-mails obtained by the Detroit Free Press, pledges were subject to a number of alleged abuses:

The e-mail said, “Brothers shot Airsoft guns, threw eggs, poked and tripped them with broomsticks, poured buckets of flour on them.”The e-mail said the next night was entertainment: “Brothers taking hockey slap-shots at the pledge class using tennis balls as hockey pucks” and “brothers violently kicking pledges in the groin to ensure that they were wearing athletic support cups.

Further allegations detail how pledges were were forced to drink “drink regurgitated water with goldfish in it,” the Free Press reports.

The fraternity may redevelop next year, although current members may be subject to further discipline from the university.

University of Indiana:

After a Feb. 3 party was busted by the IU Police Department leading to a suspension from its national organization less than a week later, the IU chapter of Sigma Alpha Epsilon had the opportunity to rejoin the greek community next fall. Those plans were scrapped Wednesday as the fraternity’s nationals closed the chapter until further notice.

SAE joins Theta Chi and Pi Kappa Alpha on the list of IU fraternity’s that have been kicked off campus since the beginning of the 2001-2002 school year.

In a press release, the national organization stated the chapter is to be restructured “to better meet the mission of the Fraternity and the expectations of the University and chapter alumni.”

The SAE nationals also said any activity at IU under the name of SAE is unauthorized and could hurt the chapter’s chances of returning to the Bloomington campus.

“All parties involved recognized that the ideals of our creed and ritual were not being met, and many of the young men had a different vision of what Sigma Alpha Epsilon was to be,” SAE Executive Director, Tom Goodale said in the release.

Dean of Students, Dick McKaig, said the decision came solely from the national organization, but the University was involved in the discussions concerning the sanctions and offers its full support of the decision.

McKaig said, from his assessment, the actions taken by the chapter since its suspension were not in the direction the nationals and the University had hoped. McKaig also said the University would have looked into the actions of the chapter if the national organization would not have taken this action.

“People’s jaws dropped, guys were crying, everyone was upset; it was pretty traumatic,” Guiser said.

As far as the timeliness of the decision, Guiser said it could have been handled better because it is finals week and current members are scrambling to find whatever housing is left for the next school year.

“(Nationals) left us hanging out in the open, picking up crumbs of whatever is left of housing,” he said. “They didn’t handle it as well as they should have. They didn’t give us proper notification. It’s not up to me to decide if it’s fair or justified. It’s up to nationals and the University, and they felt it was the best for them.”

“Guys are disappointed we can’t live with each other on a day to day basis, but nothing’s changed. We all feel we are the closest group of brothers on this campus. They can shut down SAE but they can’t shut down gamma.”

For now, the SAE chapter that was founded in 1907 does not have a specified date as to its return. The press release issued by nationals said stakeholders will meet to determine when the chapter will be readmitted to campus, but the earliest possible date for the reorganizing of the chapter will be fall 2003.

“(SAE will) try to get back as quick as they can, but they cannot guarantee it will be that soon,” Redmond said.

Cornell University

Cornell University Friday withdrew recognition of the Sigma Alpha Epsilon fraternity for the next five years, following the February death of student George Desdunes. SAE failed to call for medical help after the 19-year-old was provided alcohol “while in the care of certain members and associate members,” a university representative announced.

All SAE members must vacate the house by March 31. The fraternity chapter will not be allowed to use the university’s name, participate in any educational, social or athletic program or use university facilities for fraternity purposes.

“Even though the members and associate members recognized the condition Desdunes was in, they failed to call for medical care. He subsequently died,” Vice President of Student and Academic Services Susan Murphy said.

The university had temporarily suspended the SAE chapter during an internal probe of the chapter’s involvement in Desdunes’ Feb. death.

The loss of University recognition is the loss of any and all privileges and benefits bestowed upon a recognized fraternity or sorority, including but not limited to those listed below. Sigma Alpha Epsilon fraternity must:

1. Vacate the house located at 122 McGraw Place.

2. Stop identifying the chapter with Cornell, and stop the use of the university’s name in any fashion;

3. Withdraw from the university’s organizations related to self-governance of the fraternity and sorority system at Cornell (e.g., the Interfraternity Council);

4. Withdraw from all University membership solicitation programs or separate membership solicitation programs, as articulated and monitored by the self-governance organizations of the fraternity and sorority system within the terms of University policies (i.e., any form of recruitment activities are not permitted);

5. Withdraw from all educational, social, philanthropic/service and athletic programs and activities of the university, which are provided for fraternal organizations; and,

6. The Sigma Alpha Epsilon fraternity is denied access to and use of University facilities for official functions as approved by the university offices under whose jurisdiction utilization of a particular University facility is regulated.

If recognition is requested and approved at any point following the five-year period, the chapter would remain on probationary recognition for an additional period of no less than three calendar years.

Here’s the link to a few others:

Vanderbilt

Kentucky

University of Central Florida

It’s not hazing. It’s brotherhood.

If you haven’t noticed, our PledgeMaster avatar serves as the face of the Brotherhood. We didn’t choose it for shits and giggles. In case you were wondering, there are reasons the PledgeMaster  serves as the sole author of the Brotherhood. During pledgeship, there are a ton of symbolic figures and rituals that almost anyone can relate to. With the epic paddle to the handful of Greek letters adorned atop each and every fraternity house, no symbol comes close to that of the Pledge Master. While the role remains the same, there are a few different names that can be used interchangeably. From Pledge Trainer to Pledge Educator, there has and always will be a brother who leads the way for the new pledge class.

During #2 rush, when the entire brotherhood is meeting the slew of #49 future frat-stars and #18 GDI’s hoping to join Greek-life, the Pledge Master sits in the background. He makes a point of not introducing himself to any prospective pledges. Once the pledge class has been confirmed,  the Pledge Master introduces himself as their leader. In a semester full of bitching, hazing and mental torture, the Pledge Master presents himself as their sole friend in the brotherhood (other than their #54 big brother).

The Pledge Master is closest to the #13 Pledge Class President, or PCP. While it is the PCP’s responsibility to keep the pledge class in line, the Pledge Master shows the new group what path to walk along. The PCP lives the worst life as a pledge, but serves an invaluable role for his pledge class. As a pledge, if you have a question, you call your Pledge Master. He tells you where to be, and when to be there. He warns you about upcoming events, along with the difficulty of them. He’ll reveal secrets here and there, and continue to build your trust as your saving grace.

The Mind Fuck

As a pledge, it’s hard to understand why exactly a brother would sign up to become the Pledge Master. As you’ll see, the Brotherhood will turn against the Pledge Master if the pledge class doesn’t perform to the highest standards. He becomes an outcast in the brotherhood, almost an equal to one of the pledges. This solidifies the relationship between the Pledge Master and his pledge class.

As the weeks go on, you and your pledge class will wonder what’s to come. It’s the #3 fear of the unknown that fucks with your mind the most. Halfway through pledgeship you’ll know who to avoid, most notably the designated #4 asshole of the brotherhood.

The Twist

Here’s the spoiler alert. If you haven’t gone through pledgeship, stop fucking reading. It’ll ruin all the fun. Anyways, here’s the deal. From day one, the Pledge Master puts on a show. The amount of work that goes down in the background of pledgeship is ridiculous. Until you’ve joined the brotherhood, you’ll never understand the amount of planning, work and implementation that occurs. It’s ironic how much effort a bunch of #1 Animal House frat-stars can put forth into something they love. From day one, the Pledge Master builds the relationship with his pledge class. He’s your best friend, and he wants to make you love him. As the weeks go on, the brotherhood will turn against him, on purpose. Everything that happens merely builds the relationship between the pledge class and the Pledge Master. Yet, through it all, the Pledge Master runs pledgeship. He is the one planning each and every event. He creates and implements the playbook of pledgeship, down to the very hour of every day.

Your failure as a pledge class is pre-determined. There are activities, events and objectives that are made to be impossible. The Pledge Master serves as the puppet master, and the entire brotherhood makes pledgeship as real and ridiculous as possible. In essence, the Pledge Master runs both the brotherhood and pledge class. He tells the brothers what they’re able to do, and when. As the pledge class enters new stages of pledgeship, the Pledge Master allows the brotherhood to haze more and more. More than anything, it is the Pledge Master who is fucking over the pledge class more than anybody.

Yet with #37 every new year, new semester and new pledge class, there comes a new Pledge Master. The role garners a ton of respect, while the master playbook becomes better and better each and every year. Pledgeship accumulates, and the hazing techniques get better with each and every pledge class. So there you have it, no you know just how important the Pledge Master is to the brotherhood.

It’s not hazing. It’s brotherhood.

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2003: Pimps

Pictured: Hideki Matsui.

2004: Elvises

From left: Andy Phillips, Bubba Crosby, Scott Proctor, Brad Halsey, and Dioner Navarro.

2005: Cheerleaders

From left: Robinson Cano and Chien-Ming Wang.

2006: George Steinbrenners

2007: The Wizard of Oz Characters

2008: The Village People

2009: Batman Characters

This year’s rookies donned Batman costumes, though we’re not sure massage therapist Lew Potter’s sweet Penguin outfit constitutes hazing.

From left: Radar gun operator Brett Weber, video coordinator Anthony Flynn, Joe Girardi, Mark Melancon, Ramiro Pena, Michael Dunn, and massage therapist Lew Potter.

Like I said, it’s easy to laugh at all this. But really, what’s the difference between these pictures and #53 pledge attire? Absolutely nothing. Just making a point…

All the credit goes to these guys.

It’s not hazing. It’s brotherhood.

Why Underground Fraternities?

A recent submission came our way in need of some informational advice on the stance of underground fraternities. So, what exactly is an underground fraternity? It’s a fraternity that has been officially removed from university affiliation. Or, the national chapter of the fraternity could have disaffiliated the fraternity from the overall order. In either case, the once-know fraternity transitions into a mere group of guys with some common purpose. Hell, there really isn’t any difference between a rogue fraternity and the local basket-weaving club.

The ways in which a fraternity is forced to go underground are countless. The most common reason is a university sanction. Fraternities are charged on a weekly basis for underage drinking, hazing, and countless other bullshit offenses. Check out our series of IN THE NEWS: a week doesn’t go by without a fraternity getting fucked for some bullshit reason. Once a fraternity has used up the last of its nine lives, the university or college will “kick” them off of campus. If the fraternity house is on campus property, the house must be vacated immediately. Henceforth, the fraternity is no longer in affiliation with the university. The national chapter of your fraternity will most likely revoke your charter as well. For all those who need fraternal education, each fraternity on a college campus is a sub-sect of a larger national chapter. For instance, Sigma Chi at the University of Georgia is a sub-sect of the National Sigma Chi Order. Make sense?

So there are the basics as to why chapters are forced to go underground. Once a fraternity has fallen off the edge, it is up to the group of guys as to what happens next.

Survival

Like previously stated, once a fraternity has lost it’s official position on campus, the group of guys is no different than any other club, society or sporting group. It’s up to them whether the brotherhood stays alive. In most cases, a fraternity will get kicked off campus for a select number of years (usually 4). In other cases, the national chapter might revoke any affiliation, causing the fraternity to affiliate with a different national chapter. In other words, Delta Chi might become Theta Chi. It’s one of the many options.

Either way, the brotherhood must stay alive. Even though your position on campus isn’t official, there’s nothing stopping you from maintaining the same traditions you’ve always kept. By no means should you simply fade away into oblivion. Fuck that. You’ve come too far. Continue recruiting, and continue hazing. Besides, #53 pledge attire is life attire. Stay fratty. The effort you’re going to have to exert will triple, but it’s worth every second.

With underground fraternities come underground hazing, underground #2 rush and underground parties. While no longer being affiliated with the university or national chapter, you have the freedom to do a few things differently. In due time, universities all across the country will slowly deplete our Greek system. Fraternities will have to learn how to survive underground. #16 The importance of secrecy becomes more important than ever.

You must maintain your hierarchy, and continue to recruit more than ever before. The more parties you throw, the longer you’ll survive. You must keep your name alive, and keep your fraternity image intact. Feel free to keep the same fraternity name, but nothing’s official. If your fraternity is evicted from your fraternity house, take over another one. Find an off-campus house that’s big enough, or take over an apartment complex. The key is unity. You guys must stay together and persist through time. It’s not fucking easy, but it’s better than being a #20 GDI. Look at the bright side, if you’re no longer considered a fraternity, then both the University and national chapter can’t touch you. But you obviously need to worry about the cops. #15 Brotherhood Haters: Fuck the Police.

Society butt-fucks us on a daily basis with their goody-good morals and values. Yet, fraternities have always found a way to beat the system. Keep the brotherhood alive through underground efforts. In the words of #52 Charlie Sheen, we always win.

It’s not hazing. It’s brotherhood.

The Selection Process

Let’s get this straight. Every fraternity goes through a different process when it comes to assigning big brothers. Some houses assign a big brother to each pledge without any input from the pledges. Other houses let the pledges hand-select who they want to be their big brother. Sometimes there’s a mix of the two. If a pledge chooses his top 5, the brotherhood then selects the best brother on the list for each pledge.

Your big brother is your ally. The brotherhood will give you a big brother that will legitimately help you along the way. The closer you are with your big brother, the better your pledgeship and overall fraternity experience will be. If you get to decide, choose wisely. Find the brother who you believe will bend over backwards for you. Atleast a brother who seems to care…

In most cases, the pledges choose the brother who they knew from their hometown. In other cases, it’s the brother who hasn’t been the #4 asshole of the brotherhood. Or atleast the brother who hasn’t fucked with you yet.

The irony of the situation involves certain brothers who are trying to get little brothers. There’s a handful of brothers who will be especially nice to you at the beginning of the year to hopefully grab a little bro. Some brothers just want to haze balls; don’t even consider them (for obvious reasons).

Big Brother Night

When all is said and done, you’ve got to celebrate. Each big bro and little bro team up to take part in one of the greatest party nights you’ll ever experience. In some houses, your entire pledge class will party with the big brothers. In other cases, each pledge will party with his big bro, along with his big bro. It’s a generation pledge class thing… tough to explain. Either way, no matter how it’s done, there’s a party. Remember,#33 pledgeship is always a party. Some will make it to the bars, others to a strip club. Some kill a 24-pack, and others kill a fifth of liquor. Each fraternity and each house has their own tradition.

The entire night is made to remind the pledges that there is in fact a light at the end of the tunnel. More than anything, big brother night builds trust between a pledge and his big brother. It’s going to be a long road ahead. You’re going to have to trust your big brother at times.

Big brother night is the symbolic night in which a pledge gives his big brother a paddle. We’ll talk about this in detail another time…

The Long Run

In the long run, your big brother might be the guy you stay closest to years after graduation. In most cases, your big brother is the first brother you met in the fraternity. He’s the guy who will help you through the hardest semester of your life. At a time when boys are suppossed to become men, your big brother will serve as a hybrid father figure. Because he’s been through pledgeship already, you’ll trust his advice over anybody else. The entire big brother process is priceless. A few years after pledgeship, you might have the rare opportunity to haze your big brother through #26 brother hazing. But hey, just remember everything he did for you. It’s a tradition that makes the system go-round every single semester.

Cheers to big brothers. If you know a #49 future frat-star, then start talking to him about the greatest brotherhood on earth. Who knows, he could be your little bro one day. When it comes to big brothers, consider it an honor if you’re ever chosen to be one.

It’s not hazing. It’s brotherhood.

Unless you’ve been through it, you have no idea what it’s like. No matter how big of a hard-ass you are, initiation into the brotherhood is priceless. You might not cry, and fuck, you might not even put on a smile. But there’s no doubt in my mind that each and every new initiate is fucking estastic on the inside. With the Spring semester coming to a close, give the pledges hell in their final days. Once they’re initiated, buy ‘em a beer. They deserve one.

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It’s not hazing. It’s brotherhood.

Once #2 rush concludes, and each young freshman has solidified his desires, initiation transitions the #18 GDI into a pledge. What does that mean? It means that pledgeship has begun. From day 1, the rules are set. As the #16 importance of secrecy has and will always be the most important rule, pledge attire isn’t far behind.

What is Pledge Attire?

It’s what each and every pledge has to wear on a daily basis. Every fraternity has a different outfit, but almost all fraternities share the same beliefs as to what pledge attire is supposed to accomplish. No longer can you wear your high school gym shorts, an undershirt and a pair of tennis shoes. If you’re going to pledge, then everyone is going to know you’re a pledge.

The most common form of pledge attire involves a polo, khakis and boat shoes. Some fraternities shoot for the stars with suit and tie. Some days you’ll wear your “pledge jersey”. It’s relative as to what fraternity you join. Yet, there’s one thing in common between all fraternities. There’s always a dress code, and pledge attire is enforced at all times. The #21 ideal pledge does exactly what the brotherhood asks.

So why do we do it? There are more reasons than you think…

Unity

One of the most important concepts of pledgeship is unity. You will become best friends with your pledge class, and the brotherhood won’t stop pledgeship until that’s the case. It starts with the small things. The entire pledge class wears the same outfits to signify their unified presence of being the brotherhood’s bitches. In all seriousness, if you can’t dress like a team, you aren’t a team. This can be related to any sports team or group out there.

Class

Each pledge class signifies the brotherhood they’re representing. We don’t tell our pledges to dress up in clown outfits; that’s just not respectful. We want to show off our pledges to the entire university. Each girl on campus should be wet with excitement as to how good looking each pledge is. Let’s not forget that pledges are the future of our brotherhood.

Representation

If your fraternity is that of steroids and tight t-shirts, then your pledges will sport a completely different outfit than those of southern class. It’s all about representation; each pledge symbolizes the look of the brotherhood. If your fraternity involves pledge attire of suit and tie, then you’re showing your passion for perfection.

A Test

There are countless tests in pledgeship. If you can’t adhere to the basic rules of pledge attire, then you’ve got a long road ahead of you. Pledge attire is made to keep you in line, and see if you’re able to follow the rules. If your shirt needs to be tucked in, then by damn the brotherhood is going to enforce it. It’s a test, and an easy one at that.

There are countless other reasons in which fraternities push pledge attire. If we’ve missed your favorite, sound off in the comments below…

It’s not hazing. It’s brotherhood.

“Everyone will say: Don’t be special, be one of us! NEWSFLASH: I am special, and I will never be one of you.”

Frat-stars are unique. They’re special, and don’t follow the #20 GDI lifestyle.

“It (my brain) fires in a way, not particularly from this terrestrial realm.”

Some same we pay for our friends. They hate on the way fraternities and sororities do things. That’s just fine, because frat-stars pave their own pathways. Charlie endured his pledgeship, so you won’t ever see him on the list of #17 celebrities who need to get hazed.

“I have one speed, one gear … go!”

#2 RUSH.

“Can’t is the cancer of happen. aka I can’t do it.”

Is Charlie #31 too old to pledge? Fuck no.

“I exposed them to magic. I exposed them to something they’ll never see in their boring normal lives…they’ll live with that for the rest of their lives.”

Fraternity life is unparalleled. At no other time in your life can you get away with such ridiculous shit. Charlie Sheen #12 loves college, without a doubt.

It’s not hazing. It’s brotherhood.

Countless stories of alcohol poisoning and brutal beatings have headlined the news over the years. These instances have given society no choice in snowballing the #29 anti-hazing douchebag trend sweeping across the country. Not one fraternity guy can argue against the points they’re making. In all of these cases, hazing went too far, no doubt about it. So there’s the disclaimer. There aren’t many times where I’ll frown upon hazing. If done right, hazing can be an absolute positive in one’s life. I’ve backed this belief from the very beginning. The line… “It’s not hazing. It’s brotherhood.” is a way of fraternity life.

For every obsolete (freak) death, there are countless hazing instances in which a pledge is pushed to the brink without any worry of death. In other words, even if your life isn’t in danger, there are countless times when hazing does what it’s not supposed to do. Let’s refresh the memory as to the positives of hazing, and what hazing does for us:

Tradition

Reality Check

Personality Transformation

Unity

Brotherhood Commonality

Necessity

Historical Education

Boot Camp

Check out the previous post of #41 “Why We Haze” to read about each of these points more in detail.

Here’s a few instances, generally outlined, when hazing cross the line:

Gay Shit:

If you’re joining a homosexual fraternity, all power to you. If not, there’s no fucking reason why your manly jewels and fuck stick should ever enter the picture. #45 Elephant Walk? Fuck no. Absolutely not.

Physical Beating:

Boot camp is all good. Calisthenics and the sort could never kill you. To make things simple, you should never have a reason to physically touch a pledge. Hazing can all be commanding (verbally) and mental mindfucks. Pledges are here by choice, so you never have to physically enforce hazing.

Over-Commitment:

It’s one thing to make a pledge memorize every brother’s name, and it’s a completely different thing to make a pledge skip class, fail exams and almost drop out of college.  It’s one thing to #36 take advantage of pledges, and it’s a completely different thing to ruin their futures. Pledging can be made difficult while still remembering the fact that you’re in college.

I could go on-and-on about what not to do. I’m a firm believer that everyone knows what the limit is, and what not to do. I’m 100% pro-hazing, no doubt about it. But like all things, hazing must be in moderation. Make it work for your brotherhood. If not, you’ll either end up in jail or kicked off campus. There are enough stories of that to make me sick. If we continue to #16 practice secrecy, and learn how to haze the right way, the brotherhood will always win.

It’s not hazing. It’s brotherhood.

The last initiation activity Hart participated in, and the event that ultimately compelled him to de-initiate, took place in the TKE kitchen.

According to Hart, he and his fellow initiates were instructed to prepare breakfast for the active members in accordance with TKE initiation rule number 13—provided to Hart by the TKE Hegemon—that all pledges must “make and serve breakfast”—a task made more difficult by the trash and food that had previously been smeared on the kitchen surfaces.

Hart said that when the pledges cleaned up the trash, it was smeared back on the floor and kitchen surfaces; when they finished cooking the food, it was thrown against the wall. He said this went on for four hours.

“It was senseless and I was terrified and I was scared by what the TKEs were doing. They were purposefully intimidating me into doing what they wanted: to clean this kitchen, which in the first place had no point other than to submit to their actions,” said Hart.

Hart alleged that the TKEs employed verbal abuse to force the new members into labor similar to that in the kitchen, as well as to “dehumanize” new members in an attempt to make explicit the power dynamics between new and active members.

According to rule number five of TKE initiation, all pledges must always “wear hoodwinks but not outside.” Hart explained that a “hoodwink” is a piece of cloth adorned by a number identifying each initiate. Hart’s number was “1876.”

“I despised being called 1876. These are my friends, these are my colleagues, my peers—these are people I look up to. These are people I tutor and they are calling me 1876. It doesn’t get a whole lot more depersonalizing than that,” he said.

In 2007, former Whitman student Daniel Bachhuber also approached the administration with similar concerns. Like Hart, Bachhuber de-initiated from TKE as a result of his dissatisfaction with aspects of TKE initiation. In his three days of initiation, he experienced comparable types of food and sleep deprivation and forced cleaning.

“Initiation wasn’t anything constructive; it was destructive. If we were going to deprive ourselves of sleep but we wanted to do something constructive, we should have built a house for Habitat for Humanity or something like that,” said Bachhuber. “The way I construed the situation is that they were trying to break us down and recast us into this mold of a TKE fraternity member.”

Both Hart and Bachhuber alleged that TKE initiates were forced to take communal showers in freezing cold water. According to rule number nine of initiation, all pledges can only “shower with direction.”

“I’m told that I can’t take a shower because another rule is that pledges can only shower under the direction of an active,” said Hart. “We are all lined up. We are in our underwear; some people are naked, and we are forced to go into the shower.”

According to Cleveland, Bachhuber’s accusations were dealt with at the time by Associate Dean of Students Barbara Maxwell, the Greek advisor.

Maxwell declined to comment specifically on Bachhuber’s allegations, but said that the administration has consistently addressed complaints about conduct violations during initiation.

“When an incident gets brought forward, there’s an investigation, there’s a finding, there’s an outcome,” she said. “One [claim] wasn’t handled any differently than the other one.”

Bachhuber had problems, however, with the way the administration dealt with his claims.

“[Maxwell’s] recommendation was to express my grievances with [the fraternity presidents] and she made some sort of promise that things would be cleaned up the next time around, but I didn’t ever see the extent of what that was,” said Bachhuber. “My interpretation of the entire situation is that whoever was involved wanted to sweep the incident under the rug so they could keep on doing what they were doing.”

After de-initiating, Bachhuber struggled to connect with Whitman, especially with his friends in his residence section.

“I lived in 2-West, so everyone I knew was part of a frat house,” said Bachhuber. “To de-initiate was really hard for my social life, not necessarily because anyone made it explicitly so, but because I felt ostracized from the community that developed from [initiation].”

Hart said he did not feel the repercussions of his de-initiation as harshly as Bachhuber. According to Hart, the fact that he was a junior and had already developed a support system at the college was a primary reason for the lessened impact of his de-initiation.

“I already have my friends, whereas a lot of the freshmen are all friends with the TKEs, so they believe they would be socially ostracized,” said Hart. “I had all these other communities that were willing to welcome me.”

Maxwell agreed that the desire to be accepted as part of a group might deter some students from coming forward with allegations of misconduct.

“I think it’s hard [to come forward] if you’ve got an affiliation or attachment to a particular group, whether that’s a fraternity, sorority or an athletic team or another club on campus,” she said. “It’s human nature to want to be affiliated and want to be accepted.”

Interfraternity Council President, and member of Sigma Chi, junior Peter Olson contests the claim that participation in fraternity initiations is influenced by peer pressure.

“Not all the time are people pledging with all their best friends,” said Olson. “Theoretically you could see how that may happen, but at Sig we actively work to have an open channel of communication and really check in with them throughout pledgeship and initiation to make sure they’re comfortable with everything going on and that they’re having a good time.”

Maxwell added that national Greek organizations have been very proactive in developing communication channels for members, including toll-free 800 numbers where misconduct claims can be reported anonymously.

Bachhuber left Whitman in May 2007 after his first year, a decision which he said was influenced by his experiences both during and after initiation.

“I initially took a leave of absence and then I dropped out all together. A good 60 percent [of this decision] was because of initiation. The singular effect of de-initiating destroyed my entire community at Whitman and the community of what Whitman is supposed to be about,” he said.

SOURCE

Any thoughts? Sound off in the comments below.

It’s not hazing. It’s brotherhood.

You go through a shit-ton of phases in your life. From diapers to sports to women, you never stop molding the person you’re destined to become. In that respect, there are a handful of guys each year who develop their true calling at an early age. These glorious saviors are known as future frat-stars. These guys know from an early age that a specific fraternity awaits them in due time. Fuck everything else, it’s all about the brotherhood. With every fad that runs across the country, they dust it off their shoulders. No fad can replace a future frat-star. What exactly makes a future frat-star?

Player:

The future frat-star pulls ass like it’s his job. As early as 8^th grade, he knows what his dick is for, and he uses it accordingly. Preparing for the onslaught of sorostitutes is key in frat-star development. When you’re pounding everything around you at an early age, you’ve got potential.

Alcoholic-In-Training:

It’s one thing to drink under-aged, and it’s a completely different thing to grab a brew in your early teens. Future frat-stars acquire the taste of beer at an early age, and develop their drinking habits quickly. You need to build your immunity, and learn how to funnel. It’s key in college.

Frat Attire:

Hollister? American Eagle? Fuck no. It’s all about Polos, Khaki’s, a visor and a quality pair of boat shoes. A future frat-star invests in his attire, and looks clean at all times. No baggy shit, emo black or flashy jewelry. It’s about the look.

Priorities:

You’ve got to know what’s important, and what’s not. Grades? Fuck it. As long as you’re getting into a university with a quality Greek-life, you’re all set. Girlfriend? Unless it’s your smokin’ hot English teacher, never succumb to getting locked down. Life is short, so fuck a lot.

The details can be hammered down, but you get the picture. The future frat-star is the high school stud who knows his pathway in life. He’ll live the dream for a minimum of 4 years, and will definitely pledge as a freshman in the fall. Future frat-stars are rare, and can only be seen by current brothers. At some point in time the keys to the castle must be given to those below you. Make sure each pledge class is as kick-ass as possible to preserve the brotherhood. God Bless future frat-stars, they’re the life of fraternities.

It’s not hazing. It’s brotherhood.

Otter: Flounder, I am appointing you pledge representative to the social committee.

Flounder: Gee Otter, thanks. What do I have to do?

Otter: It means you have to drive us to the Food King.

As the winter cold-streak fades away, we remember just how much of a role the weather plays in pledgeship. The spring pledge class has one overwhelming advantage: Spring Break. Taking a week off is a blessing. I don’t care if you go skiing, on a cruise, or get laid every single night on Spring Break. No matter what, you won’t enjoy your spring break as much as a spring pledge will. It’s peace, quiet and a week of lovely nothingness. It’s impossible to appreciate unless you’ve experienced it.

It’s not hazing. It’s brotherhood.

Hi again,

So far nothing has been bad at all but we’re only 3 weeks in and I don’t know if that would change. Our typical week’s requirements are getting 6 interviews done. Most of the interviews take over 1-2 hours, and some brothers give you trivia to complete before getting their signature on the interview. Some trivia is absurd like catching a chicken and bringing it to them, going to the events of which there are intramurals going on and dressing up in a suit and tie three days of the week with dress pants. One of our pledge rules is do anything a brother asks (i.e. spend most rainy days driving brothers around if we don’t have class, bringing them food in libraries, etc.). As far as events goes, we have to be at the house at 5:45 am on wednesdays to do an intense sessions of running, pushups, etc.  About half of us end up puking (7 total in the pledge class). We have pledge education on sundays where we get quizzed on random stuff, but that’s expected. We also have to DD 1+ times a week from 9pm – 3am.
I guess that about sums it up.

Thanks for the help PledgeMaster.

Sound familiar? This pledgeship mirrors the norm of all fraternity pledgeships. You have to remember that the extreme hazing we talk about is becoming a minority these days. Yet, designated driving, pledge attire, interviews, etc. are all fair game in the eyes of the average university. The lack of physical abuse (hazing) goes to prove what fraternity he’s pledging. Unfortunately, in due time, universities will crack down on all forms of pledgeship. There are countless cases in which fraternities are being kicked off campus for merely making their pledges DD late at night. Either way, we’ll keep you updated on our pledge-in-progress.

It’s not hazing. It’s brotherhood.

An alleged hazing incident involving the Zeta Phi Beta sorority at the University of Maryland has rocked the campus.

A 22-year-old pledge has alleged that Zeta Phi Beta sorority sisters took her off campus and punched, choked and beat her with a wooden paddle.

She was told it was part of a hazing ritual. But she didn’t accept it.

The pledge reported the alleged incident to authorities and now seven sorority sisters are facing charges of felony second-degree assault and misdemeanor hazing.

According to court records, the seven charged are: Amber Bijou, 22; Bridget Blount, 24; Montressa Hammond, 24; Kandyce Jackson, 23; Tymesha Pendleton, 26; Zakiya Shivers, 26; and Monika Young, 23.

Four of the seven sorority sisters appeared in court Thursday. Several of the women charged were given an April 1 court date.

Two of the defendants — Bridget Blount, 24, and Zakiya Shivers, 26 — failed to appear in court Thursday morning and warrants were issued for their arrests.

It was unclear if their absence was intentional or accidental.

At least one defendant who was not scheduled to be arraigned Thursday appeared in court and was arraigned.

The lawyer for Pendleton said his client, who will soon earn a masters degree and begin pursuing a Ph. D, is innocent.

“The idea of hazing is abhorrent to her, something she does not subscribe to in any way,” said attorney James Papirmeister. “What happened to the alleged victim we’re not sure I know she did not do it.”

Even though the sorority doesn’t have a traditional sorority house, they are a national organization. It’s been at Maryland for 30 years.

SOURCE

You have to love the comment at the bottom of the news article website… an anonymous reader posted: “I wish someone would try this on my sister”. Interesting…

It’s not hazing. It’s brotherhood.

Let’s take this a little deeper. Try and comprehend the amount of hazing that goes on from the last day of rush up until the final day of initiation. The moment of pledgeship’s end will be a topic for another time, but for the time being, just understand the moment we’re talking about. What moment? The moment when the brotherhood deems pledgeship to be done. Your shit-stain title of “Pledge” turns into that of “Brother”. Does the transition come with a medal? Fuck no. It’s internal happiness; no one should be patting yourself on the back more than yourself. You made it.

If any of you have a job out there, you’re bound to have a boss. You know him  through work, and do all things possible to stay low and keep that paycheck coming. He barks up your ass for months, constantly pushing you to get your shit done. He has the best parking spot in the lot, and you don’t have one. He gets paid more, and makes you feel like shit. Its corporate hazing, gotta love it. Well… the day comes when he’ll shake your hand as an equal. Instead of bitching about your latest mistakes, he promotes you to co-manager. You’re his equal, his exact equal. Your pay-checks are now the same, and you both have glorious parking spots. So… how exactly does your friendship look now? Any payback for all the shit he put you through?

It’s fucked up. When pledgeship is over with, pledges have three choices. What type of brother one becomes is the direct affect of the first few choices right out of pledgeship:

Bitter Brother:

The bitter brothers are those who never forgive those who hazed him. It’s mental, and sometimes physical. These guys won’t ever talk to the older guys. In due time, they won’t hesitate to take a swing at the brother he hated most. He’s bitter, no doubt about it. It’s human to hate those who f ucked with you. But in the case of fraternities and hazing, it’s just an awkward transition that needs to take place. These brothers are the ones who haze the following semester more than any other brother. They take out their anger on the following pledge class.

Ghost Brother:

Some pledges grow into fraternal shit. He runs… plain and simple. If the pledge had a rough time during pledgeship, it is very possible that he’ll never come back once it’s over. It’s a bitter brother with a vagina on top. You can’t stop them from leaving, it’s their choice. A ghost brother will only show his face when he needs to. Other than that, he’s just as valuable as a GDI.

Hero Brother:

Brother hero’s know how the game is played. They understand that pledgeship is merely a process, and should not be taken personally. Hero brothers become active in the fraternity, and pass on the age-old process of pledgeship to those after them. God bless those who grow a pair during pledgeship. Hero brothers keep fraternities alive, and inspire those below them to join the brotherhood when their times comes.

When all is said and done, time usually heals all bitterness. The newly initiated brothers become one with the brotherhood, and everyone lives happily ever after. You have to understand that everyone went through the same process as you… and one day, you’ll be able to pass on the same amount of shit that was once given to you. It’s tradition.

So when that awkward transition comes your way, embrace it. You’ve made it. Drop your grievances, and move on. Accept the process, and pass it on.

It’s not hazing. It’s brotherhood.